Tiger Woods wife Elin Nordegren to leave him, newspaper reports

(News.com.au)

















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Tiger's wife to leave him = A few girlies the motive!

(by Mark McNamara)

Woods to take indefinite leave from golf

(Lancaster Eagle Gazette)

















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Woods to take indefinite break = O, wife and I to take rest in bed! OK?

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Woods fleeing US for safe haven

(News.com.au)

















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Woods fleeing US for safe haven = Aha! New deviousness - golfer off!

(by Mark McNamara)

Haggling begins at UN climate talks

(Sydney Morning Herald)

















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The Climate Talks = Task: Halt ice melt!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Divisions run deep in Copenhagen

(ABC News)

















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Divisions run deep in Copenhagen = Opposing ninnies underachieved

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Gino and Stuart Face Charges Over Rat Death

(What's On TV)

















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Chef Gino D'Acampo and actor Stuart Manning = Ach! I'm consuming a fat rat on Ant and Dec prog!

(by Tony Crafter)

Russian nightclub fire victims mourned

(CBC)

















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Russian city of Perm = Music party's on fire

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Sponsors support Tiger Woods despite Rachel Uchitel, Jamiee Grubbs, Kalika Moquin

(Examiner)

















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Rachel Uchitel, Jaimee Grubbs and Kalika Moquin = All make a major Tiger hack his unique club in bed!

(by Adie Pena)

Swiss ban mosque minarets

(Stuff.co.nz)

















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Swiss ban mosque minarets = Swiss ban request - no imams!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Teachers not to blame for language problems

(Asia One)

















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Problem in Chinese? = Incomprehensible!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Siberian tiger in severe decline

(BBC News)

















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The Siberian Tiger Monitoring Programme = I am reporting on rare ones. It might be grim.

(by Adie Pena)

Prisoner deal hits snag on Hamas demands

(Reuters)

















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Prisoner deal hits snag on Hamas demands = Main reason's - pleaded ransom stands high

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Do dads belong in the delivery room?

(Time)

















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Do dads belong in the delivery room? = The man's giddy over red blood - no lie!

(by Dharam Khalsa)

Why so many Jews are atheists

(YnetNews)

















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Why so many Jews are atheists = Jewish mother's asset, anyway

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Don't kiss Santa, he may have the flu

(Yahoo! News)

















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Don't kiss Santa, he may have the flu = Save youth - hand the fake man lists!

(by Dharam Khalsa)

The Israel-Hamas prisoner swap deal near: officials

(Washington Post)

















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The Israel-Hamas prisoner swap deal near: officials = O, Palestinians release him for a few sharp radicals!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Filipino declared Hero of the Year by CNN

(Inquirer)

















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A Filipino is named CNN "Hero of the Year" = I, this homey Efren Penaflorida, an icon?

(by Adie Pena)

Depressed woman loses benefits over Facebook photos

(Yahoo! News)

















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Depressed woman loses benefits over Facebook photos = Aha! Web snoopers observed posted smiles, took offence.

(by Dharam Khalsa)

Terror plot ringleader gets 13-year prison term

(CBS 47)

















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Ringleader Narseal Batiste = A danger, sir. An elite blaster.

(by Adie Pena)

As Henry shows, footballers can't be trusted

(USA Today)

















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As Henry shows, footballers can't be trusted = So far, brethren, no doubt - he was tactless & sly!

(by Aronas Pinchas)