Accenture ends Tiger Woods sponsorship deal

(BBC News)

















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Accenture, Gillette, Gatorade = Agree, all enacted to cut Tiger

(by Mark McNamara)

Christmas Gifts for Beer Lovers

(Bournemouth Echo)

















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Christmas Gifts for Beer Lovers? = Offer the gross victims barrels?!

(by Maurice Goddard)

'Up in the Air' Tops Golden Globe Nominations

(People)

















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Up In The Air, starring George Clooney = Hero in one great picture gains glory

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Italy's PM Silvio Berlusconi is bloodied by attack

(BBC News)

















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Civil loon bruises = Silvio Berlusconi

(by Tony Crafter)

Intersex News: Vindicated!

(Intersex News)

















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Sex chromosome virility? = Love's XY itch. I'm Romeo sir!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Tiger Woods wife Elin Nordegren to leave him, newspaper reports

(News.com.au)

















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Tiger's wife to leave him = A few girlies the motive!

(by Mark McNamara)

Woods to take indefinite leave from golf

(Lancaster Eagle Gazette)

















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Woods to take indefinite break = O, wife and I to take rest in bed! OK?

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Woods fleeing US for safe haven

(News.com.au)

















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Woods fleeing US for safe haven = Aha! New deviousness - golfer off!

(by Mark McNamara)

Haggling begins at UN climate talks

(Sydney Morning Herald)

















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The Climate Talks = Task: Halt ice melt!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Divisions run deep in Copenhagen

(ABC News)

















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Divisions run deep in Copenhagen = Opposing ninnies underachieved

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Gino and Stuart Face Charges Over Rat Death

(What's On TV)

















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Chef Gino D'Acampo and actor Stuart Manning = Ach! I'm consuming a fat rat on Ant and Dec prog!

(by Tony Crafter)

Russian nightclub fire victims mourned

(CBC)

















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Russian city of Perm = Music party's on fire

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Sponsors support Tiger Woods despite Rachel Uchitel, Jamiee Grubbs, Kalika Moquin

(Examiner)

















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Rachel Uchitel, Jaimee Grubbs and Kalika Moquin = All make a major Tiger hack his unique club in bed!

(by Adie Pena)

Swiss ban mosque minarets

(Stuff.co.nz)

















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Swiss ban mosque minarets = Swiss ban request - no imams!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Teachers not to blame for language problems

(Asia One)

















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Problem in Chinese? = Incomprehensible!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Siberian tiger in severe decline

(BBC News)

















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The Siberian Tiger Monitoring Programme = I am reporting on rare ones. It might be grim.

(by Adie Pena)

Prisoner deal hits snag on Hamas demands

(Reuters)

















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Prisoner deal hits snag on Hamas demands = Main reason's - pleaded ransom stands high

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Do dads belong in the delivery room?

(Time)

















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Do dads belong in the delivery room? = The man's giddy over red blood - no lie!

(by Dharam Khalsa)

Why so many Jews are atheists

(YnetNews)

















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Why so many Jews are atheists = Jewish mother's asset, anyway

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Don't kiss Santa, he may have the flu

(Yahoo! News)

















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Don't kiss Santa, he may have the flu = Save youth - hand the fake man lists!

(by Dharam Khalsa)