Playboy Berlusconi won't change

(The Hindustan Times)


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Playboy Berlusconi won't change = Italy's grubby cheap clown No.One!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Putin's Left Eye Appears to Need a Cold Compress

(The New York Times)


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Putin’s Left Eye Appears to Need a Cold Compress = Top Russian sly-faced creep seemed pale, not top!

(by Maurice Goddard)

China claims supercomputer crown

(BBC)


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China claims supercomputer crown = Atomic power crunch, rips Uncle Sam!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Tony Blair's sister-in-law converts to Islam

(The Guardian)


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Tony Blair's sister-in-law converts to Islam = Woman's story recalls blest visit into Iran

(by Dharam Khalsa)

What Cherie Blair's eBay shopping list reveals

(The Guardian)


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Cherie Blair has sold Tony's signature. Where? = Internet's eBay. Weird eh? Oh, our girl has class!

(by Tony Crafter)

Testing the Tea Party: Will the movement live or die?

(CNN)


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Testing the Tea Party: Will the movement live or die? = Titter in my esteemed, grave vote: "To hell with Palin!"

(by Maurice Goddard)

Wayne Rooney labelled a 'whore'

(Metro)


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The Manchester United footballer Wayne Rooney = Neanderthal brute, lots of nice money, yet a whore.

(by Tony Crafter)

Cheryl Cole sobs in Piers Morgan interview and admits she still loves Ashley

(The Daily Mirror)


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Piers Morgan's interview with Cheryl Cole = Millions view & watch report, see her crying

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Michael Jackson top-earning dead celebrity - Forbes

(Yahoo! News)


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Michael Jackson top-earning dead celebrity - Forbes = Die??? An incredible late performance by Jacko's ghost!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Indonesia warns volcano could erupt at any time

(MSNBC)


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Indonesia warns volcano could erupt at any time = Island country mountaintop lava increased woe

(by Steve Allison)

Cheryl Cole Cries Over Ashley, Malaria, Deathbed Will. Piers Morgan Unrepentant

(HolyMoly)


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Piers Morgan's interview with Cheryl Cole = In which pretty singer cries over low male

(by Tony Crafter)

Celine Dion gives birth to twin boys

(BBC)


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Celine Dion gives birth to twin boys = I love it! CD song here in "Two Tiny Bibs"

(by Maurice Goddard)

The Tricks and Trials of Traveling While Fat

(The New York Times)


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The Tricks and Trials of Traveling While Fat = I'll think? Few love darn tight aircraft seats!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Quiet Vancouver neighborhood privy to bizarre Randy Quaid arrest

(Vancouver Sun)


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Quiet Vancouver neighborhood privy to bizarre Randy Quaid arrest = So quit running over border, quit! Avoid crazy behavior! Dare therapy...

(by Steve Allison)

Derrike Cope's nieces to debut in Martinsville truck race

(Yahoo! Sports)


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Twins Amber and Angela Cope = Team plowed, began in NASCAR

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Jane Austen's style might not be hers, academic claims

(BBC)


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Jane Austen's style might not be hers, academic claims = Lame charge, just to catch "Emma" & "Sense and Sensibility"?

(by Maurice Goddard)

As GOP Seeks Spending Cuts, Details Are Scarce

(The New York Times)


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As GOP seeks spending cuts, details are scarce = Rednecks accept a useless gossip rag instead

(by Dharam Khalsa)

Secret files shed light on ugliness of Iraq war

(MSNBC)


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NYT: U.S. documents detail horrific abuse by Iraq's army, police = Question: Any real surprise? Cyclic hatred! You bad misfit mob!

(by Steve Allison)

Three drills, two engineers and one unprecedented rescue operation

(The Independent)


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Up and out into the sun, home at last! Jubilant Chilean gold miners now finally freed! = Months in an underground jail, no panic but awfully hot. Death tale? Lifetime lesson!

(by Steve Allison)

Taiwanese woman to marry herself

(The Daily Telegraph)


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Taiwanese woman to marry herself = "Now me - as my wife - rather star alone?"

(by Maurice Goddard)