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Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Royal wedding: Prince William to marry Kate Middleton on Friday April 29, 2011

(The Daily Telegraph)
Britain's Prince William and his fiancee Kate Middleton (L) pose for a photograph in St. James's Palace, central London in a November 16, 2010 file photo. Britain's Prince William is to marry his fiancee Kate Middleton on Friday April 29 next year at London's Westminster Abbey, the 1,000-year-old church where the funeral was held for his mother Princess Diana. REUTERS/Suzanne Plunkett/files (BRITAIN - Tags: SOCIETY ROYALS ENTERTAINMENT PROFILE)

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On April twenty-ninth, two thousand and eleven, in Westminster Abbey, = When Bonny William weds a pretty hotter, suntanned bonniest native!
(by Maurice Goddard)
By Anu Garg Add a comment

Monday, November 22, 2010

Pope says in book he would resign if incapacitated

(Reuters)
Pope Benedict XVI waves as he leads the Angelus prayer at the end of a mass to consecrate La Sagrada Familia church as a Basilica in Barcelona November 7, 2010. REUTERS/Albert Gea (SPAIN - Tags: RELIGION)

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Pope says in book he would resign if incapacitated = "I, being one old crock, a fat unhappy dope as I, it's wise."
(by Maurice Goddard)
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UK to lend Ireland £7bn

(Financial Times)
Irish Prime Minister Brian Cowen (2nd R) speaks during a news conference on the steps of Government Buildings, in Dublin November 22, 2010. Cowen resisted calls for his resignation on Monday, vowing to stay in power long enough to pass an austerity budget needed for an EU/IMF bailout package, and then call an early election. REUTERS/Cathal McNaughton (IRELAND - Tags: BUSINESS POLITICS)

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UK to lend Ireland seven billions = It's real - London even likes Dublin!
(by Aronas Pinchas)
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Sunday, November 21, 2010

Hillary Clinton Says She Won't Run Again for Elective Office

(Bloomberg)
U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton (R) gestures while meeting with France's Foreign Affairs Minister Michele Alliot-Marie for bilateral talks at the NATO summit in Lisbon, November 20, 2010. REUTERS/Marcelo del Pozo (PORTUGAL - Tags: POLITICS MILITARY)

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Hillary Clinton says She won't run again for elective office = "I'll choose to live years on in affluence, writing fancy trash!"
(by Maurice Goddard)
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St. Louis tops list of most dangerous US cities

(Yahoo! News)
The Old Courthouse was the site of the Dred Scott court case in 1847 and 1850. The building was built in the 1820s, although there have been many alterations since then.

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Tops list of most dangerous US cities = Imperfect St. Louis's status is no good
(by Adie Pena)
By Anu Garg Add a comment

Sarah Palin's 'America by Heart' sure to stir friends - and enemies

(Christian Science Monitor)
ANCHORAGE, AK - OCTOBER 28: Former Republican Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin speaks in support of Senatorial candidate Joe Miller at a rally on October 28, 2010 in Anchorage, Alaska. Miller, a Tea Party favorite, is in a tight race with Repbulican incumbant Lisa Murkowsiki, who is running as a write- in candidate for Senate after losing to Miller in the Republican primary. (Photo by John Moore/Getty Images)

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Sarah Palin's 'America by Heart' sure to stir friends - and enemies = A finer sneer is: "Trash!! Primordial batty dame's a sheer nuisance!"
(by Maurice Goddard)
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Mark Twain's Autobiography Flying Off the Shelves

(The New York Times)


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Mark Twain's autobiography flying off the shelves = 'A Vast Long Life Of Ink' by Tom Sawyer's high-up father
(by Maurice Goddard)
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Friday, November 19, 2010

Royal wedding set to be bank holiday

(The Daily Telegraph)
Mugs commemorating the engagement of Britain's Prince William to Kate Middleton are put into boxes at the Prince William Pottery Company in Liverpool, northern England November 18, 2010. REUTERS/Phil Noble (BRITAIN - Tags: SOCIETY ROYALS)

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Royal wedding set to be bank holiday = Odd? Will, and rosy Kate, in the Abbey go.
(by Maurice Goddard)
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Orlando Airport Moves to Ditch TSA Staff

(Newser)
A Transportation Security Administration (TSA) agent conducts a pat down search of passengers arriving for flights at Denver International Airport less than a week away from the Thanksgiving holiday on November 19, 2010 in Denver. UPI/Gary C. Caskey Photo via Newscom

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Orlando Airport Moves to Ditch TSA Staff = Hats off, MCO! A stand! Avoid terrorist plot
(by Michael Hammond)
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Thursday, November 18, 2010

Ahmadinejad warns against foreign interference in Iran's affairs

(Christian Science Monitor)
ITAR-TASS: BAKU, AZARBAIJAN. NOVEMBER 18, 2010. Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad speaks at a meeting with Russian president. (Photo ITAR-TASS/ Dmitry Astakhov) Photo via Newscom

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Ahmadinejad warns against foreign interference in Iran's affairs = Sin if insane Tehran, again and again, rejects fine order, affirms war
(by Aronas Pinchas)
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For Fab Four, a long and winding road to the iTunes Store

(Washington Post)
SAN ANSELMO, CA - NOVEMBER 16: A Beatles song plays on an iPod November 16, 2010 in San Anselmo, California. Apple has struck a deal with the record label EMI and the Beatles' company Apple Corps to sell digital downloads of the legendary rock band's music on iTunes. (Photo Illustration by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images)

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For Fab Four, a long and winding road to the iTunes Store = Fan? Grin or win! I got around, to afford The Beatles' sound!
(by Maurice Goddard)
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It's Official: Susan Boyle Now As Big As The Beatles

(Time)
47360, EDINBURGH, SCOTLAND - Thursday November 11, 2010. Susan Boyle signs autographs of her new book 'The Woman I Was Born to Be' for her fans at the Waterstone Bookstore in Edinburgh. Photograph: Deadline Scotland, PacificCoastNews.com

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It's official: Susan Boyle now as big as The Beatles = A fab, beefy, able, sanguine Scottish soloist wails!
(by Maurice Goddard)
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Bush's 'Decision Points' Is A Terrifying Journey Into the Authoritarian Mind

(Huffington Post)
Former U.S. President George W. Bush signs copies of his new memoir Decision Points at a Barnes & Noble in Houston, Texas on November 17, 2010. Hundreds of people lined up for the chance to purchase signed copies of Decision Points at the bookstore. UPI/Aaron M. Sprecher Photo via Newscom

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Bush's 'Decision Points' is a terrifying journey into the authoritarian mind = Hi! 'Joint Tyrant Decisions', by nuttier, paranoid, heinous, shiftier ignoramus!
(by Maurice Goddard)
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Palin says she can beat Obama

(USA Today)
CHARLESTON, WV - OCTOBER 30: Former vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin speaks to supporters of Republican John Raese during a rally for his U.S. Senate campaign October 30, 2010 in Charleston, West Virginia. Raese and West Virginia Gov. Joe Manchin, a Democrat, are embroiled in a hotly-contested race for the seat vacated following the death of Robert C. Byrd. (Photo by Randy Snyder/Getty Images)

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Palin says she can beat Obama = Base: Ah, some typical bananas!
(by Aronas Pinchas)
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Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Can science prove we're psychic?

(MSNBC)
Gypsy woman with powers

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Can science prove we're psychic? = We chirp: "Creepy cases convince!"
(by Maurice Goddard)
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Why gold is a bad investment

(MarketWatch)
Gold Coins

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Why gold is a bad investment = Net-thing was loved by Midas
(by Aronas Pinchas)

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Why gold is a bad investment = Bandits envy the Midas glow!
(by Maurice Goddard)
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Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Mel Gibson Admits "Slapping" Oksana

(The Superficial)
Hand in hand on the red carpet with controlled smiles and loving exchanges, Mel Gibson and Oksana reveal no signs of the dysfunction and disorder in their relationship. However, recent reports have shed light on the true nature of their relationship, which was shrouded in scandal from it s beginning until it s violent and bitter end. These archived pictures show the couple throughout their Fame Pictures, Inc

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Mel Gibson admits slapping Oksana = Man's said: Belt? I'm spanking gal...Oops!
(by Aronas Pinchas)

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Mel Gibson admits slapping oksana = "Bliss, pal, means I'm good at spanking!"
(by Maurice Goddard)
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World's smallest woman's joy at Guinness award

(The Daily Telegraph)


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World's smallest woman's joy at Guinness award = As adrenal "wows" run, midget's joy wasn't so small!
(by Maurice Goddard)
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Prince William and Kate Middleton Are Enagaged!

(People)
Britain's Prince William and his fiancee Kate Middleton pose for a photograph in St. James's Palace, in central London November 16, 2010. Britain's Prince William is to marry his long-term girlfriend Kate Middleton next year, after an on-off courtship lasting nearly a decade, bringing months of speculation about his intentions to an end. REUTERS/Suzanne Plunkett (BRITAIN - Tags: SOCIETY ROYALS)

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Prince William engaged to Kate Middleton = Coming, potential wedding - dreamlike tale!
(by Aronas Pinchas)
By Anu Garg Add a comment

Monday, November 15, 2010

Passenger Refuses Full Body Scan, the Groin Check

(CBS News)
MANCHESTER, ENGLAND - JANUARY 07: A full body scan image on a computer screen on trial at Manchester Airport on January 7, 2010 in Manchester, England. The scanner x-rays to the depth of 10mm to produce an outline of the person's body which is then used to detect concealed, potentially dangerous objects. The image is then transmitted to a remote security officer who has no visual or verbal contact with the area where the machine is located. The images are deleted and can never be retrieved after the operator closes the window and the passenger is cleared. (Photo by Christopher Furlong/Getty Images)

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Passenger refuses full body scan, the groin check = You can't see his balls, check gruff person's gender!
(by Aronas Pinchas)
By Anu Garg Add a comment
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