It's National Chocolate Cake Day!

(Christian Science Monitor)

Photo: freakgirl

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National Chocolate Cake Day = OO! Cake! Any child can eat a lot!

(by Maurice Goddard)

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National Chocolate Cake Day = Ah, cocoa eaten today can kill!

(by Adie Pena)

Winter storm impacts Amtrak service north of New York

(Boston Globe)

Photo: J. Paxon Reyes

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Winter storm impacts Amtrak service north of New York = Workers watch track from stop: "My train is NEVER on time!"

(by Dharam Khalsa)

HIV 'Whoonga' Drug Craze Grips South Africa

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: alancleaver_2000

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HIV 'Whoonga' Drug Craze Grips South Africa = A cravings war. Go out for such a prized high.

(by Chris Sturdy)

Sick of winter? Too bad! Another storm heads East

(AP)

Photo: zophonias

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Sick of winter? Too bad! Another storm heads East = Snow! Dream of both artist and ice-skaters too, eh?

State of the Union: Obama says U.S. acts 'together, or not at all'

Photo: Neal1960

(Los Angeles Times)

















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State of the Union: Obama says U.S. acts 'together, or not at all' = A stony route to go? He's as Abraham Lincoln to statute feats!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Washington Day Ahead: Obama Calls for Unity in State of Union

(Bloomberg)

Photo: Robert Couse-Baker

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Obama Calls for Unity in State of Union = Notify, fabulous American nation lost!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

CNN Poll: Palin unfavorable rating at all time high

(CNN)

Photo: xomiele

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CNN Poll: Palin unfavorable rating at all time high = Thing all learn: Flipping cat ain't human, or lovable!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Tony Blair went to war without cabinet consent, senior mandarins say

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: verseguru

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Tony Blair went to war without cabinet consent, senior mandarins say = Near nonsense! Tyrannic idiot was to blame! Tyrannic war twit Bush too!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Bored? Why not hand knit your very own Kate Middleton and Prince William

(HeatWorld)

Photo: esther1616

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Bored? Why not hand knit your very own Kate Middleton and Prince William = Hint in a link? I'd love a cuddly, Kate-nymph teddy bear winner tomorrow now!

(by Maurice Goddard)

George Clooney on marriage: 'I gave it a shot'

(CNN)

Photo: manfrys

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George Clooney on marriage: 'I gave it a shot' = "Ergo, gay motto is: Cheerio gaol! Never again!"

(by Maurice Goddard)

Revealed: Italian PM's harem of 14 young girls

(Rediff)

Photo: rogimmi

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Italy's Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi = I proclaim virility on nubile mistresses

(by Tony Crafter)

Pinay is 2011 Ford Supermodel of the World

(Manila Bulletin)

Photo: Reza Vaziri

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The Ford Supermodel of the World Danica Magpantay = Fresh noted Pinay face would add glamor to the ramp!

(by Adie Pena)

New tests for 'murder weapon' in Amanda Knox case

(BBC)

Photo: saschapohflepp

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Amanda Knox revisits court on latest appeal hearing = DNA on stain shall prove I am not Perugia sex-attacker

(by Tony Crafter)

Joan Rivers canceled by Fox having called Sarah Palin 'stupid and a threat'

(IrishCentral)

Photo: David Shankbone

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Joan Rivers had called her 'stupid and a threat' = Sarah Palin? Journals here added that verdict.

(by Adie Pena)

Model in Milan prostitution investigation admits sleeping with Berlusconi

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: Alessio85

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Model in Milan prostitution investigation admits sleeping with Berlusconi = "Politician thug, Prime Minister idiot loon Silvio, was nuts in bed! Gent's mental!"

(by Maurice Goddard)

Memorial to World Cup predicting octopus opens

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: Saspotato

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Memorial to World Cup predicting octopus opens = We glum on prime octopod's plastic reproduction

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Florida teens arrested for stealing and snorting human remains

(Examiner)

Photo: merlinprincesse

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Florida teens arrested for stealing and snorting human remains = I ran in on a teenager's ignorant error: "This damn stuff smells dead!"

(by Steve Allison)

Four Haitians accuse "Baby Doc" of torture, abuse

(Reuters)

Photo: a-birdie

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Four Haitians accuse "Baby Doc" of torture, abuse = Coo! Return of a shabby brute face, it's audacious!

(by Maurice Goddard)

China's leader arrives in U.S. for 'do-over' visit

(MSNBC)

Photo: Downing Street

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China's leader arrives in U.S. for 'do-over' visit = Survives hairdresser! In on a vital coif re-do!

(by Steve Allison)

Royal Wedding: Stanley Gibbons predicts boost from stamps and mugs

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: esther1616

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Royal Wedding: Stanley Gibbons predicts boost from stamps and mugs = Soppy crass Brits 'll go daft buying mementos, to snob-wedding's drama!

(by Maurice Goddard)