Sarah Palin not running for president

(CBS News)

Photo: monkey_bob99x

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Sarah Louise Heath Palin = Hail, hail eh? Not a USA Pres.!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Trial to begin for alleged underwear bomber

(MSNBC)

Photo: roberthuffstutter

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Trial to begin for alleged underwear bomber = Bulletin: For errand, bomber got a real wedgie!

(by Steve Allison)

Downton Abbey to battle Doctor Who in feature-length Christmas special?

(Metro)

Photo: KCTS 9

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Downton Abbey to battle Doctor Who in feature-length Christmas special? = Can not see both out of that BBC Timelord and telly showpiece ratings war

(by Chris Sturdy)

Michelle Obama shops incognito at Target

(CBS News)

Photo: DonkeyHotey

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Michelle Obama shops incognito = Ooh, big economic spin - SHE at mall!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Conrad Murray on trial for involuntary manslaughter of Michael Jackson

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: roberthuffstutter

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The manslaughter trial of Dr Conrad Murray in LA = Man's error and drug ration hurt Michael fatally?

(by Tony Crafter)

Michael Jackson doctor trial begins with jury told of singer's final moments

(The Guardian)

Photo: Oceania Rock

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Michael Jackson doctor trial begins with jury told of singer's final moments = The world still mourns the loss of Jacko. By an incriminating jam, doc gets fire!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Iranian President's attack on West causes mass UN walkout

(Open Globe)

Photo: david shankbone

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Iranian president's attack on west causes mass UN walkout = Ace war twit taints our minds? Eek! Consulates, spank a UN ass!

(by Charles Faulkner)

Video! Spielberg's 'Terra Nova' Premieres Tonight

(Extra)

Photo: Fox

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'Terra Nova' Premieres Tonight = 'Reprints' another great movie

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Perry on God: I was 'lost spiritually and emotionally'

(MSNBC)

Photo: ian.korn

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Perry on God: I was 'lost spiritually and emotionally' = God on Perry: Ow! Damn! Not a lie, y'all - U.S. patriot is silly!

(by Steve Allison)

Nyad defies age, fatigue, jellies on marathon swim

(CBS News)

Photo: Diana Nyed

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Nyad defies age, fatigue, jellies on marathon swim = "Gee, I'm wet & fluid & foamy!" No jesting! She's a real naiad!

(by Steve Allison)

Island nations warn of climate disaster at UN

(MSNBC)

Photo: Harry

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Island nations warn of climate disaster at UN = Fatalistic... Islands under water... Nations moan...

(by Steve Allison)

Republican presidential candidates debate in Orlando

(Washington Post)

Photo: DonkeyHotey

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The United States of America Republican Presidential Candidates ~ are ambitious, fancied, tactile, unelected star-and-stripe pinheads!

(by Maurice Goddard)

In Iowa, Perry rips Romney over healthcare plan

(Reuters)

Photo: DonkeyHotey

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In Iowa, Perry rips Romney over healthcare plan = A proven amoral, sly, hypocrite winner pair here!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Libya's NTC Fighters Beaten Back by Gadhafi Loyalists

(VOA News)

Photo: Magharebia

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The Gadhafi loyalists = Alas, those fight daily!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

General Motors Is Said to Offer Bonuses and Reopened Plant

(The New York Times)

Photo: paul (dex)

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General Motors Corporation = O, reporting on a lot more cars!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Amy Winehouse is still here with me... we'll save kids from drugs

(The Sun)

Photo: NRK P3

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Amy Winehouse is still here with me... we'll save kids from drugs = "My work... Her melodies will give us fresh stimuli, as she wanted."

(by Maurice Goddard)

Binge-drinking: Let's face the facts

(The Chronicle Herald)

Photo: christian.senger

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Binge-drinking's most negative aspects = Stricken, beaten, pissed gangs vomiting.

(by Maurice Goddard)

Angola's Leila Lopes takes Miss Universe 2011 crown

(USA Today)

Photo: Miss Universe Organization

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Miss Angola Leila Lopes = O, a gal pleases millions!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Obama sends jobs bill to Congress, urges "no games, no politics, no delays"

(CBS News)

Photo: The White House

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'No games, no politics, no delays' = As one slogan: 'Once, simply do it!'

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Can Obama get his jobs bill passed?

(CBS News)

Photo: The White House

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Can Obama get his jobs bill passed? = Is bad speech. Obama stalling jobs.

(by Daniel W Morales)