Scientists ask public to help decode whale song

(The Guardian)

Photo: Peter Nijenhuis

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Scientists ask public to help decode whale song = Oceans delights! Bulls itch and pipe to seek cows!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Vladimir Putin promises reshuffle after Russia election protests

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: DonkeyHotey

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Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin = Ultra-sinister prim VIP, maimed in ruins?

(by Maurice Goddard)

Alcohol-induced liver problems soar among young adults

(The Guardian)

Photo: tristanforestjames

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Alcohol-induced liver problems soar among young adults = Pub danger! Eventually gloom and doom: Callous Cirrhosis

(by Maurice Goddard)

The Duplicity of Newton Leroy Gingrich

(AngryWhiteDude)

Photo: Gage Skidmore

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Newton Leroy Gingrich = Cheer wriggly nit on? NO!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Gingrich May Test Voters' Limits

(The New York Times)

Photo: johnmaloof

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Gingrich May Test Voters' Limits = A slimy rotter's vice might sting!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Paul McCartney has recurring nightmares of audience walking out

(The Daily Mirror)

Photo: John McNab

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Paul McCartney has recurring nightmares of audience walking out = Rue! A haunting frightening illusory concert dream, wakes Macca up!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Man is accidentally shot by his own dog

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: Leanda

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Man is accidentally shot by his own dog = And I'd say, somewhat consolingly, "Bitch!"

(by Dharam Khalsa)

Eiffel Tower could become world's tallest tree

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: Stuck in Customs

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Eiffel Tower could become world's tallest tree = Fellow wrote of roulette-selected cedar limbs?

(by Dharam Khalsa)

Norway mass murder suspect is insane, police say

(CNN)

Photo: lwpkommunikacio

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Norway mass murder suspect is insane, police say = Cops use new story - Andreas is simply maniac, sure!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

GOP outsider Ron Paul gaining traction in Iowa

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: iceman9294

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Ron Paul = O, run, pal!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

'Exceptionalism' Argument May Prove Potent for Republicans

(The New York Times)

Photo: Cain and Todd Benson

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'Exceptionalism' Argument May Prove Potent for Republicans = A TV's creepier cunning fox, Mitt Romney, peppers Obama all out!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Infidelity, divorce, and Newt Gingrich: Can voters get past his record?

(Christian Science Monitor)

Photo: DonkeyHotey

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Infidelity, divorce, and Newt Gingrich: Can voters get past his record? = Sins, vice, eh? The Grand Old Party's deceiving fornicator twit, cringed!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Silvio Berlusconi hints at comeback as Italy tries to form new government

(The Guardian)

Photo: Roberto Rizzato

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Silvio Berlusconi hints at comeback as Italy tries to form new government = Strictly hit, Boo! Raving clown's make-believe moronic fantasies torment us!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Penn State sex abuse scandal: Sandusky, Paterno investigated

(Today's THV)

Photo: marsmet551

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PSU Defensive Coordinator = Indict duo! Perv fears noose.

(by Charles Arey)

Silvio Berlusconi 'could quit as Italy PM this weekend' amid eurozone fears

(Metro)

Photo: DonkeyHotey

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The Italian PM Silvio Berlusconi = Mean politician bullshit is over

(by Adie Pena)

Paterno Enabled Sandusky Sex-abuse Scandal

(The Washington Times-Herald)

Photo: acaben

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Penn State Nittany Lions = Online tip : nasty tenants

Daniel Ortega appears set to win presidential election in Nicaragua

(Christian Science Monitor)

Photo: Sven Hansen

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Daniel Ortega = To regain lead

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Asteroid 2005 YU55 To Narrowly Miss Earth

(Huffington Post)
zoom

Photo: NASA

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Asteroid to Narrowly Miss Earth = A disaster nearly hits tomorrow

(by Aronas Pinchas)

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Asteroid To Narrowly Miss Earth = Whoa, a disaster! Mostly in terror!

(by Adie Pena)

Andy Rooney, a Cranky Voice of CBS, Dies at 92

(The New York Times)

Photo: billypalooza

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The commentator Andrew Aitken "Andy" Rooney = One more other cranky man dead at ninety-two

(by Adie Pena)

Comet Elenin is dead, along with doomsday predictions

(The Cosmos News)

Photo: NASA

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"Comet Elenin is still dead." = Eliminated. Silenced. Lost.

(by Adie Pena)