Vishal Thakkar, Oklahoma Man, Sues After Plastic Surgery Leaves Him Without A Nose

(Huffington Post)

Photo: CREDITS

Vishal Thakkar, Oklahoma Man, Sues After Plastic Surgery Leaves Him Without A Nose = A ruthless rhinoplasty hack makes mistake with nasal valve ratio. Uh, measure, goof!

(by Julian Lofts)

Global Concern Grows About Deadly Middle East Respiratory Syndrome

(VOA News)

Photo: 757Live

The Middle East respiratory syndrome coronavirus = A horror: very resistant, deadly, monstrous epidemic

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Collection of phone records stirs debate: Valuable tool or 'beyond Orwellian'?

(CNN)

Photo: Russ Allison Loar

Senators (Feinstein, et al.) will defend phone snooping = Opponents, sensing the felon, defined it as Orwellian

(by Rosie Perera)

Report: Secret court order forces Verizon to turn over telephone records of millions

(CNN)

Photo: davnull

A secret court order forces Verizon to turn over telephone records of millions = Covert spies recorded our "Hello, NZ!" to confront terrorists?! Uncool! Am I ever free?

(by Rosie Perera)

Law change kills Germany's longest word

(AP)

Photo: udge

Rindfleischetikettierungsueberwachungsaufgabenuebertragungsgesetz = Unusual that Fritz's seen engaging with EC but, e.g. ceding UK burgers are BSE-free!

(by Chris Sturdy)

Restaurant Ice Is Dirtier Than Toilet Water Says Disgusting New Report

(The Inquisitr)

Photo: Kevin Saff

Restaurant Ice Is Dirtier Than Toilet Water = E.coli? Waiter, I trust it's there in a darn treat!

(by Adie Pena)

SJM money was gambling winnings: Carson Yeung

(The Business Daily)

Photo: das farbamt

Carson Yeung, the main shareowner of Birmingham City = Casino gaming winner? Oh, rather a Brummy con. Yes, thief!

(by Jason Lofts)

Rafael Nadal advances

(ESPN)

Photo: James Marvin Phelps

Rafael Nadal is Outgunning the Rest in French Opens = Gleeful Spaniard Routs the French Tennis Again, 'non'?

(by Pat Rourke)

The Most Controversial Article In All Of English Wikipedia Is George W. Bush's

(Huffington Post)

Photo: Renegade98

The most controversial article in all of English Wikipedia is George W. Bush's = I see writers still weigh it, responding, "Is he a giant schmuck or a lovable fool?"

(by Rosie Perera)

Oscar Pistorius heartbroken, uncle says

(CNN)

Photo: aktivioslo

Oscar Pistorius heartbroken, uncle says = A sprinter, unlucky as a shooter, cries. SOB!

Oscar Pistorius heartbroken, uncle says = Unlucky as a rat, Boer on prosthesis cries

(by Jason Lofts)

GMO? They say no

(The World)

Photo: CT Senate Democrats

The genetically modified organisms = One family digesting more laced shit!

(by Adie Pena)

Moore, Oklahoma hit by massive tornado

(The Guardian)

Photo: The US Army

The massive tornado in Moore, Oklahoma = Shook homes. Emotional drama ain't over!

(by Adie Pena)

Sarah Palin: It Snowed In Alaska In May, So There Is No Global Warming

(Huffington Post)

Photo: Gene1138

Sarah Palin: "It snowed in Alaska in May, so there is no Global Warming." = A brainwashed woman ignoring all analysis (or the map!): "It's snake oil."

(by Dharam Khalsa)

First Saudi woman summits Mount Everest

(CNN)

Photo: Facebook/Raha Moharrak

The Saudi woman = I saw mount-head

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Plane lands without landing gear at Newark

(CNN)

Photo: KentonNgo

Plane lands without landing gear in New Jersey = And a jet spilling oil endangers the new runway

(by Rosie Perera)

Quirk of beer fate helps Bayern Munich avoid dressing room meltdown ahead of Champions League final

(Yahoo! Eurosport)

Photo: Doha Stadium Plus

Quirk of beer fate helps Bayern Munich avoid dressing room meltdown ahead of Champions League final = Boateng piqued devout muslim Franck Ribery, dampened him. He is on his own as a fan of alcohol-free lager!

(by Chris Sturdy)

Alaska volcano spews ash plume near air traffic route

(Reuters)

Photo: NOAA

The Alaska volcano = So, hot lava can leak

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Double Mastectomy: Why Angelina Jolie Had Breast Removal Surgery

(Huffington Post)

Art: The PIX-JOCKEY

Angelina Jolie has Preventive Double Mastectomy = Brad loves to eye the implant cleavage (mine). Join us!

(by Rosie Perera)

Long-missing trio found in Cleveland

(The Columbus Dispatch)

Photo: 757Live

The abductor Ariel Castro = Trio? Cruel bastard to each!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Death Toll Surges at Bangladesh Garment Factory Collapse

(ABC News)

Photo: Taslima Akhter

Death Toll Surges at Bangladesh Garment Factory Collapse = Fast struggle to search the bloc and tally personal damage

(by Dharam Khalsa)