'Twerking' and 'selfie' added to Oxford dictionary

(BBC)

Photo: caribb

Twerking enters OED = New stinker 'greed to

(by Adam Beardwell)

Zheng Jie knocks Venus Williams out of U.S. Open

(Los Angeles Times)

Photo: y.caradec

Venus Williams is knocked out of U.S. Open tournament by Zheng Jie = Gadzooks! Flukey Chinese just won mean tennis prelim. But V: "No! IOU!"

(by Jason Lofts)

Woman rips out 6-year old boy's eyes in China

(NewsShow)

Photo: Sukanto Debnath

Attacker rips out eyes of little boy in China = A heinously sick petty fanatic - too terrible!

(by Julian Lofts)

New York Times and Twitter struggle after Syrian hack

(BBC)

Photo: Scott Beale

New York Times and Twitter struggle after Syrian hack = Murky SEA's warring attack on NYT. Fight riled tweeters.

(by Jason Lofts)

Singapore's Scoot Latest Airline to Offer Child-Free Flying Zone

(Time)

Photo: Simon_sees

Singapore's Scoot Latest Airline to Offer Child-Free Flying Zone = I feel frenzied Catholic priests or felons are not going to fly SA

(by Julian Lofts)

Nigerian boy flies to Lagos from home town hiding in airplane wheel cavity

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: amlusch

Nigerian boy flies to Lagos from home town hiding in airplane wheel cavity = Hypothermic stowaway and moron fleeing on airline Boeing flight is alive

(by Julian Lofts)

Tale of adultery, deception, death

(The New Zealand Herald)

Photo: Abode of Chaos

Tale of adultery, deception, death = Hatred fueled plot to eat cyanide

(by Julian Lofts)

Yosemite fire threatens Bay Area water, power

(USA Today)

Photo: CREDITS

Yosemite fire threatens Bay Area water and power = A fiery terror! We weep at heat. [Ed.: An arsonist, maybe?]

(by Jason Lofts)

A Novelist Who Made Crime an Art, and His Bad Guys 'Fun'

(The New York Times)

Photo: John Levanen

Elmore Leonard: A Novelist who Made Crime an Art, and his 'Bad Guys' Fun, Dies age Eighty-seven Years Old = Dear unforgettable man, a loved doyen - savageness in really grimy ideas which so endeared him to us

(by Julian Lofts)

'MOMO' The Sam Giancana Documentary Feature Film Wins 'BEST MOVIE' at the Monaco Charity Film Festival

(Garnier)

Illustration: Shawn Calvert

Infamous Sam ("Mo", "Momo" or "The Cigar") Giancana. O, wasn't he a mobster chief? = Mamma mia, not wrong! A member of Chicago's Cosa Nostra, a heinous thief!

(by Jason Lofts)

Scores Killed in Syria, With Signs of Chemical Warfare

(The New York Times)

Photo: Asitimes

Scores Killed in Syria, With Signs of Chemical Warfare = Wily foe Assad's horrific, sickening, lethal war crimes

(by Julian Lofts)

About one-third of white girls use tanning bed, despite cancer risks

(New York Daily News)

Photo: leyla.a

One-third of American white girls use tanning beds, dramatically increasing cancer risks = Nice girls, if recent research said melanoma is sinister and tragic, why go in and turn black?

(by Josiah Winslow)

Explosive breast implants now a terror threat

(UPI)

Photo: libby lynn

Explosive breast implants now a terror threat = A vile terrorist bosom thwarts an expert panel

(by Julian Lofts)

Schapelle Corby's strict parole conditions revealed

(One News Page)

Photo: publik16

Schapelle Corby's strict parole conditions revealed = Cops release convicted dealer on Bali - script shortly?

(by Julian Lofts)

Woman swallows tapeworm to lose weight; tells doctor she bought it on the Internet

(Huffington Post)

Photo: rhysvsgodzilla

Woman swallows tapeworm to lose weight; tells doctor she bought it on the Internet = Wow! Iowan hog resorts to a cattle helminth to slim. Then purges bowel to settle down.

(by Julian Lofts)

Princess Diana Murder Allegations Suggest British Sniper Involved In Death

(The Inquisitr)

Photo: aromano

Princess Diana murder allegations suggest a British sniper involved in death = Guests Di 'n' Dodi shot in car in Paris underpass? Bet English revive alarming tale!

(by Jason Lofts)

3-Month-Old Indian Infant Keeps Catching Fire; Doctors Say Baby Emits Combustible Gases Through Skin Pores

(The International Business Times)

Photo: andymag

Three-Month-Old Indian Infant Keeps Catching Fire; Doctors Say Baby Emits Combustible Gases Through Skin Pores = Spontaneous combusting baby story is fiction. Hospital agree estranged mother harmed his neck skin. Bitch fled.

(by Julian Lofts)

UK Threatens EU Action Over Gibraltar Rift

(The Wall Street Journal)

Photo: BBM Explorer

Britain threatens legal action against Spaniards = Nation's anger: Gibraltar isn't a Hispanic state. Deal?

(by Tony Crafter)

Family tomb opened in Florence in a bid to identify Mona Lisa

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: Wikimedia

Family tomb opened in Florence in a bid to identify Mona Lisa = Leonardo and fey omniscient Italian model (inept iffy bimbo)

(by Julian Lofts)

Assange-led Wikileaks Party candidates could upset balance of power in Upper House

(The New Zealand Herald)

Photo: acidpolly

Assange-led Wikileaks Party candidates could upset balance of power in Upper House = A political Ocker hacker applies for seat in pudgy Senate. Sweden/US paused - would ban

(by Julian Lofts)