Britain braced for hurricane-force 'St. Jude' storm

(Reuters)

Photo: CREDITS

Britain braced for hurricane-force 'St. Jude' storm = Be absurd journos, dramatic effect rich in terror!

(by Chris Sturdy)

Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr announce split

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: SynergyByDesign

Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr announce split = Uninspired actor and/or a blank model - normal, no?

(by Julian Lofts)

Top German spy chiefs to go to Washington for talks

(BBC)

Photo: Adam Lederer

Top German spy chiefs to go to Washington for talks = Stasi go to lengths, get proof, confirm how Yanks tap

(by Julian Lofts)

Merkel: US spying has shattered allies' trust

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: Downing Street

Merkel: US spying has shattered allies' trust = Angela strips her myth, sees USA killed trust!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

The Japanese men who prefer virtual girls to sex

(BBC)

Photo: Greg Myers

The Japanese men who prefer virtual girls to sex = Animation over raw flesh perplexes - just get her!

(by Julian Lofts)

Oneal Morris Gets 1 Year In Jail For Botched Butt Injections

(Huffington Post)


Oneal Morris Gets One Year In Jail For Botched Butt Injections = Cretin's bionic augmentation of derriere - jolly jab to hotness?

(by Julian Lofts)

Bugging row threatens to re-open divisions on EU data protection

( The Irish Times)

Photo: Horia Varlan

Bugging row threatens to re-open divisions on EU data protection = Power and egos together contributing to eavesdrop insinuation!

(by Mark McNamara)

Apple a day makes learning like play for young pupils

(The New Zealand Herald)

Photo: Yutaka Tsutano

Apple a day makes learning like play for young pupils = All young keenly like popular iPad apps, in gay frames!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Italian police bust ring of corrupt morticians

(Reuters)

Photo: Gerard Queen

Italian police bust ring of corrupt morticians = Carabinieri put stop to criminal sin. Court: "Flog?"

Italian police busted ring of corrupt morticians = Cops ban illicit corpse fraud intrigue in Roma. OTT!

(by Jason Lofts)

Les agriculteurs mobilisés contre l'écotaxe

(Le Parisien)

Photo: Aidan Brooks

Les agriculteurs mobilisés contre l'écotaxe = Tax résumé: bill risen, I lose cos-lettuce^* cargo
* romaine lettuce

(by Mark McNamara)

New galaxy 'most distant' yet discovered

(BBC)

Photo: NASA

New galaxy 'most distant' yet discovered = Vast mystery alone did excite! God wasn't.

(by Maurice Goddard)

Argentine scientists tap cow burps for natural gas

(Reuters)

Photo: Compassion in World Farming

Argentine scientists tap cow burps for natural gas = Great business capturing cow farts is a rotten plan!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Syria's Assad 'more confident than ever': analysts

(Yahoo! News)

Cartoon: FreedomHouse

Syria's Assad 'more confident than ever': analysts = He's sad nation's very nasty leader or fascist man

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Russia Putting a Strong Arm on Neighbors

(The New York Times)

Illustration: The Pix-Jockey

Russia Putting a Strong Arm on Neighbors = Putin's an arrogant bossier grim thug, son!

(by Maurice Goddard)

In search of the ultimate roller coaster thrill

(BBC)

Photo: Beyond Neon

In search of the ultimate roller coaster thrill = Rash, I'll accelerate 'n' lift ... horror ... "SHIT, LET ME OUT!!!"

(by Jason Lofts)

Dick Cheney had heart device partially disabled to thwart terrorists

(The Daily Telegraph)

Illustration: DonkeyHotey

Dick Cheney had heart device partially disabled to thwart terrorists = Sadly a heart switch prevented odd illicit death by a terrorist hacker

(by Julian Lofts)

Conspiracy Theorists Link Oarfish Deaths With Impending Earthquakes

(Huffington Post)

Photo: cliff1066

Conspiracy Theorists Link Oarfish Deaths With Impending Earthquakes = The 'horrid sea snake' is pacific. Oh, why's this piquant tremor angst linked?

(by Jason Lofts)

Instead of a divorce, the GOP needs primary reform

(Reuters)

Illustration: NotionsCapital.com

Instead of a divorce, the GOP needs primary reform = Envisaged recipe for dim herd of Tea Party morons?

(by Maurice Goddard)

Greek police appeal over mystery blonde girl

(BBC)
>
Greek police appeal over mystery blonde girl = Tell cop - Greek gypsy or proverbial Madeleine?

(by Julian Lofts)

New Zealand author wins Man Booker Prize

(Al Jazeera)

Photo: Christchurch City Libraries

New Zealand author wins Man Booker Prize = A wannabe (no pro) worked 'The Luminaries' - zz....

(by Julian Lofts)