Missing Malaysia jet MH370: 'Whistleblower fund' set up

(BBC)

Photo: Bohan

Missing Malaysian jet: A 'whistleblower fund' set up = Who is it saw jet plane fall in? Mum bystander, I guess?

(by Jason Lofts)

Texas Republicans endorse cure-the-gay therapy

(The New Zealand Herald)

Photo: Third Way Think Tank

Texas Republicans endorse cure-the-gay therapy = Heterosexual purists try cheap degeneracy ban

(by Julian Lofts)

Reader warning: Harvard experts say book is bound with human skin

(CNN)

Photo: Houghton Library Blog

Arsene Houssaye's book "Des destinees de l'ame" was bound in human skin by Dr Ludovic Bouland = Seems damn dubious as deadly Hannibal Lecter's "hidebound" work? Boy, invoked nauseousness!

(by Jason Lofts)

Reader warning: Harvard experts say book is bound with human skin = Our skin's extra worthy eh? Bravo! I'd run in, sew, and make RIP handbags!

(by Maurice Goddard)

CIA sends out its first tweet - and shows it has a sense of humor

(The Guardian)


CIA sends out its first tweet - and shows it has a normal sense of humor = CIA rues that the most wanted Snowden's a Russian hero off limits. SOS!

(by Julian Lofts)

Internet Giants Erect Barriers to Spy Agencies

(The New York Times)

Photo: Fibonacci Blue

Internet giants to erect barriers to spy agencies = i.e. start encrypting secrets. Irritate NSA! O, begone!

(by Jason Lofts)

Van Gogh's Severed Ear 'Regrown' From Cells Of Artist's Living Relative

(Huffington Post)


Van Gogh's Severed Ear 'Regrown' From Cells Of Artist's Living Relative = I'd feel gross, for revolting new harvest leaves art-lovers grimacing

(by Rosie Perera)

Tibetan leader calls on China to end 'repressive policies'

(The Guardian)

Photo: kris krüg

Tibetan leader calls on China to end 'repressive policies' = No press; scarce hope in bedevilled totalitarian silence!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Pennsylvania man accused of stealing human skin from hospital

(Reuters)

Photo: Juan José Montero

A Pennsylvania man is accused of stealing human skin from hospital = Hell, man! I visualise fanatic frying them as snacks (papadums). No, no, no!

(by Julian Lofts)

Tokyo's 'oldest man' had been dead for 30 years

(BBC)

Photo: bananarchist

Tokyo's 'oldest man' had been dead for thirty years = Rather too shady mystery of a dad (skeleton) in bed!

(by Maurice Goddard)

The Queen shows us who isn't boss

(BBC)

Photo: The British Parliament

The Queen shows us who isn't boss = Unique show shows she's not best!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Syrians vote in presidential election

(The Guardian)

Cartoon: Khalid Albaih

Syrians vote in presidential election = It is ninety percent loonier Assad evil

(by Maurice Goddard)

Dan Marino sues NFL over concussions

(CNN)

Photo: Jacob Childrey

Chronic traumatic encephalopathy = I imply each contact can hurt a pro, eh?

(by Rosie Perera)

Madeleine McCann mystery: Police to dig in Portugal wasteland

(CNN)

Photo: Roger528

Police set to begin digging for Madeleine McCann = Cementing dogged belief in cop locating remains

(by Rosie Perera)

A critical theoretic Marxist dialectical analysis of the World Cup song

(The Guardian)


A critical theoretic Marxist dialectical analysis of the World Cup song = Academic: "Dull existential lyrics for sociopathic contest (alright, a war)"

(by Julian Lofts)

Angelina says Cleopatra may be her final role

(The New Zealand Herald)

Photo: Felix Nine

Angelina says Cleopatra may be her final role = An aspiring female LA actor. Heresy! LA baloney!

(by Julian Lofts)

Why is King Juan Carlos of Spain abdicating?

(BBC)

Photo: Israel Ministry of Foreign Affairs

Why is King Juan Carlos of Spain abdicating? = Yawning fainting aura is: Old chap's job sick!

(by Maurice Goddard)

US soldier freed after almost five years

(Stuff.co.nz)


"While Bowe was gone, he was never forgotten," President Barack Obama said from the White House Rose Garden. "The United States of America does not ever leave our men and women in uniform behind." = "We know desertion's a heinous crime. We want to court martial BB after we have given him a medal and paraded honoree. Oh, shun the grenadier. No sententious forgiveness. We deem BB foremost a foe!"

(by Julian Lofts)

US soldier flies to freedom after Afghan prisoner swap

(Reuters)

Photo: Wikimedia

A United States Army soldier Sergeant Bowe Bergdahl flies to freedom after Afghan prisoner swap = Western hostage (deserter?) freed by Taliban for Guantanamo POWs. Reads as if he's glorified Templar!

(by Jason Lofts)

No Tobacco Day: How to help the world stop smoking

(The Independent)

Photo: Daniel

No Tobacco Day: How to help the world stop smoking = Know-how step: Bloody cancer photos might do a lot?

(by Maurice Goddard)

How cats always fall on their feet

(The Daily Telegraph)


How cats always fall on their feet = Aha, watch felines rotate, fly, slow

(by Julian Lofts)