They were the last word in glamour, but has the sun set on LA's swimming pools?

(The Guardian)

Photo: Julien Haler

They were the last word in glamour, but has the sun set on LA's swimming pools? = So water shortages mean pastime might be shut down. Thus only oil wells run.

(by Julian Lofts)

Tony Blair Philanthropist of the Year award defended by GQ

(The Independent)

Photo: Sheryl Pouls

Tony Blair has been voted a 'Philanthropist Of The Year' = "A noble envoy! That's rather handy. (I hope it's profitable)"

(by Tony Crafter)

Tony Blair is voted the GQ 'Philanthropist Of Year' = Prattle on! He's a bloody shit! Fight poverty in Iraq!

(by Jason Lofts)

What next for Islamic State, the would-be caliphate?

(The Guardian)

Photo: Stella G Soto

A caliphate is an Islamist state = Eclipse that ISIS, attain salaam!

(by Jason Lofts)

A banana a day can help keep strokes at bay

(The Daily Express)

Photo: Maureen Veras

A banana a day can help keep strokes at bay = A-OK as an apple, say, can break any bad teeth

(by Robert Jordan)

Comedienne Joan Rivers Dead At 81

(CBS Miami)

Photo: Steve Rhodes

Late comedienne Joan Rivers = Inter one jovial screen dame

(by Jason Lofts)

Biden Warns: We Will Chase ISIS 'to the Gates of Hell'

(NBC News)

Photo: Michael Candelori

Biden Warns: We Will Chase ISIS 'to the Gates of Hell' = "Good will win the war" he hisses. Battle facileness?

(by Jason Lofts)

Newly found asteroid to pass close to Earth on Sunday

(CNN)

Photo: Philip Bond

Asteroid to pass very close to Earth = So, a threat to destroy lives or space?

(by Rosie Perera)

Wilson Raj Perumal: The man who fixed football

(CNN)

Photo: Tin Nhanh Bóng Đá

Wilson Raj Perumal is the man who fixed football = Oh, he'd plan loss for awful mob, win extra jail time

(by Rosie Perera)

Cameron says he's 'nervous' over Scottish independence vote

(Reuters)

Photo: duluoz cats

Cameron says he's 'nervous' over Scottish independence vote = Oh! To accept unseen north's severance vision, seems very odd?

(by Maurice Goddard)

ISIS video shows beheading of American journalist Steven Sotloff

(CNN)

Photo: Wikimedia

Second American journalist beheaded = Obscene end as cruel jihadi man orated

(by Rosie Perera)

Sotloff beheading: Obama warning to Islamic State

(BBC)


President Obama on IS: "Americans are repulsed by their barbarism, we will not be intimidated, their horrific acts only unite us. Our reach is long and justice will be served." = Bloody bestial! Brutal embittered British Muslim rapper beheads innocent US civilians on camera in desert. We're nearly in a second religious war. I just watch horrified!

(by Jason Lofts)

Liberia Ebola patient's dramatic recapture caught on video

(BBC)


Liberian Ebola patient's dramatic recapture has been caught on video = Oh, an unreliable pariah tries to escape but can't avoid being cremated

(by Julian Lofts)

Human trial of experimental Ebola vaccine begins this week

(CNN)

Photo: NIAID

Drug trials of the experimental vaccine = Hope it can fell tragic and extreme virus

(by Rosie Perera)

Researchers Uncover 39,000-Year-Old Abstract Art by Neanderthals

(US News & World Report)

Photo: Chris & Steve

Tic-tac-toe pattern 'demonstrates the Neanderthals' capacity for abstract thought and expression,' researchers say = Archaeologists decode their ancestors' arbitrary scratch pattern as sharp testament to unexpected fantasy then

(by Jason Lofts)

California Plastic Bag Ban Would Be First Of Its Kind In The Nation

(Huffington Post)

Photo: voltra jaibo

California Plastic Bag Ban Would Be First Of Its Kind In The Nation = Fab fit action, sir! I'd back it! Sane war on pollution and filth begins!

(by Maurice Goddard)

London: Thousands gather in massive demonstration against UK anti-semitism

(RT)

Photo: Benjamin

Massive demonstration in the UK = Shun or veto naked anti-Semitism!

(by Adie Pena)

Meet CrossFit's Fittest Man on Earth

(CNN)

Photo: Tony Felgueiras

Rich Froning wins "Fittest Man on Earth" title = Inner merit: thin star can lift tons of weight

(by Rosie Perera)

Comedian Joan Rivers, 81, rushed to New York hospital - report

(Eyewitness News)

Photo: David Shankbone

The American comedian and actress Joan A. Rivers has been rushed to a NYC hospital after she stopped breathing = Thespian has just braved throat operation and she's had emergency cardiac arrest. Bet she feels no pain in coma.

(by Julian Lofts)

UK raises terror threat level, citing Syria, Iraq risk

(CNN)

Photo: Number 10

Britain raises terror threat level = Rib-rattler ISIS to travel near here

(by Rosie Perera)

Girl accidentally kills gun instructor

(The New Zealand Herald)

Photo: Andrew Becraft

A young girl has accidentally killed her male gun instructor in Arizona = Larking gunner has used an Uzi lethally. Tragic. Clearly moronic. An idiot!

(by Julian Lofts)