Barbra Streisand's mission to end heart disease in women

(Yahoo! News)


The heart diseases = Ah, see death, sister!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Police chase naked suspect, capture him in pants

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: Magnus Buseth

Police chase naked suspect, capture him in pants = Panic? Panic's up as accused kept their helmets on

(by Robert Jordan)

'Human Barbie' Valeria Lukyanova Allegedly Attacked Outside Her Home

(Huffington Post)

Photo: Gafa Kassim

'Human Barbie' Valeria Lukyanova is allegedly attacked outside her home = A drama! A thin, gaunt dolly lookalike received abuse, hurt by male heavies

(by Jason Lofts)

Putin tops Forbes Most Powerful, beats Obama

(The New Zealand Herald)

Illustration: Valeriy Osipov

Vladimir Putin tops the Forbes Most Powerful List and beats Barack Obama = Fact: absolutist oppressor drafts evil mandate with aplomb - "Bomb Ukraine!"

(by Julian Lofts)

Things That Turn Writers Off

(Huffington Post)

Photo: Shira Gal

Things That Turn Writers Off = Worst effing rant this; truth!

(by Robert Jordan)

Scotland loses out as Japanese whisky named best in the world

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: Anokarina

Scotland loses out as a Japanese whisky named best in the world = Suntory team beats all. Caledonians spew. What shoddiness. Joke!

(by Julian Lofts)

Obama Not 'Mopey' Over Republican Victories

(Sky News)

Photo: DonkeyHotey

Obama Not 'Mopey' Over Republican Victories = 'I embrace conservative popularity boom? NO!'

(by Maurice Goddard)

Republicans claim Senate majority, take control of Congress

(Fox News)

Photo: DonkeyHotey

Senate takeover by Republicans = Top: Barack severely beaten in US

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Richard Branson vows to take family to space despite crash of Virgin Galactic spaceship

(The Daily Mirror)

Photo: National Transportation Safety Board

Richard Branson vows to take family to space despite crash of Virgin Galactic spaceship = Posh VIP's crackpot dream of being weightless is a fanatical catastrophic drive! Scary, no?

(by Maurice Goddard)

Melbourne Cup favourite Admire Rakti dies

(RT)

Photo: Grant Courtney

Horse Admire Rakti dies = Hero dies - it's dire karma

(by Julian Lofts)

Disney Princesses With Realistic Waistlines Look Utterly Fabulous

(Huffington Post)

Photo: BuzzFeed/Loryn Brantz/Walt Disney Studios

Disney Princesses With Realistic Waistlines Look Utterly Fabulous = Boy! Archetypes' silliest ultra-skinniest waists now feel ridiculous!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Acker Bilk - obituary

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: Bradford Timeline

English clarinettist Bernard Stanley "Acker" Bilk has died = Hail kindest, bright, classy, slick entertainer, bandleader

(by Julian Lofts)

Terminally ill woman in Oregon takes own life

(Houston Chronicle)


Oregon's Death With Dignity Law = God, a state worthwhile dying in!

(by Jason Lofts)

A majority of Scots would vote for independence now says poll

(Daily News & Analysis)

Photo: Ross

A majority of Scots would vote for independence now says poll = Oddly, Scotsmen people in force view London's just too far away?!

(by Maurice Goddard)

The List of Countries, Kingdoms, Empires and Principalities

Illustration: Kai Schreiber

The List of Countries, Kingdoms, Empires and Principalities 1. Algeria 2. Angola 3. Anguilla 4. Australia 5. Bahamas 6. Bali 7. Bangladesh 8. Bermuda 9. Bolivia 10.Bosnia 11.Botswana 12.Brazil 13.Brunei Darussalam 14.Burma 15.Burundi 16.Cameroon,Bulgaria, Kenya, Libya, Luxembourg, Netherlands (Holland), Singapore 17.Canada 18.China, Hong Kong 19.Colombia, Chile 20.Costa Rica 21.Croatia 22.Denmark, England 23.Democratic Republic of the Congo 24.France, Portugal 25.French Polynesia 26.Gabon 27.Georgia 28.Germany, Mexico 29.Gibraltar 30.Greece, Seychelles 31.Greenland 32.Guatemala 33.Honduras, Kosovo 34.Iran 35.Jordan, Qatar 36.Kazakhstan, Rwanda 37.Kuwait, Western Sahara 38.Latvia 39.Lebanon 40.Maldives 41.Mexico 42.Nepal 43.New Zealand 44.North Korea 45.Palestinian territories 46.PNG 47.Puerto Rico, Saint Lucia 48.Philippines 49.Poland 50.Russian Federation 51.South Africa 52.South Korea 53.Spain 54.Sweden, Norway 55.Taiwan 56.Tibet 57.Trinidad & Tobago 58.United Kingdom 59.United States of America 60.Zimbabwe

=

Announcing A Few National Mascots, Insignias, Fauna (Animals, Birds et cetera) in addition to Symbols 1. Fox 2.Turaco 3. Zenaida dove 4. Kangaroo, koala 5. Marlin (Makaira nigricans) 6. Starling (Indonesian mynah) 7. Tiger, Oriental magpie robin 8. Humpback whale 9. Llama 10.Tornjak 11.Grevy's zebra 12.Macaw 13.Tiger 14.Daung 15.Hyena 16.Lion 17.North American beaver 18.Giant panda 19.Andean condor 20.Thrush 21.Iris, marten (polecat) 22.Mute swan 23.Okapi 24.Rooster 25.Tiare 26.Black panther 27.Caucasian shepherd dog 28.Eagle 29.Ape 30.Dolphin 31.Polar bear (Ursus maritimus) 32.Quetzal 33.Deer 34.Asiatic lion 35.Oryx 36.Leopard (not Indian) 37.Arabian Camel 38.White wagtail 39.Phoenix 40.Pigeon (kotharu) 41.Golden eagle 42.Cow (edible fauna) 43.Kiwi 44.Chollima 45.Sunbird 46.Dugong, birds of paradisev 47.Amazon 48.Carabao 49.Bison 50.Brown Bear (Ursus arctos) 51.Springbok 52.Tiger 53.Bull 54.Elk 55.Bear 56.Yeti 57.Rufous-vented chachalaca, scarlet ibis 58.Bulldog 59.North American bald eagle 60.Sable antelope (ungulate) Satisfied?

(by Julian Lofts)

Apple says it'll never make a cheap iPhone

(TechRadar)

Photo: Martin Hajek

Apple says it'll never make a cheap iPhone = Snip! Heavy pocket meanie appals all here!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Chelsea Handler mocks Putin with topless photo; Instagram says no

(USA Today)


Chelsea Handler mocks Putin with topless photo; Instagram says no = Lithe woman's nipplegate snapshot on horse shocks. Radical, smutty!

(by Jason Lofts)

Sarah Palin Says She's Hoping To Run For Office Again

(Huffington Post)


Sarah Palin Says She's Hoping To Run For Office Again = Pres of Russia: "Oh, ho! A passing fancy, another failing!"

(by Dharam)

Sarah Palin Says She's Hoping To Run For Office Again = A laugh, no? Horrifying fat ass scenario if so happens!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Edmonton Airport Therapy Dogs Aim To Calm Travellers

(Huffington Post)

Photo: Global Jet

Therapy Dogs in Edmonton Airport = Departing to indoor pets' harmony

(by Rosie Perera)

Unmanned Antares rocket explodes on launch

(USA Today)

Photo: NASA Goddard Space Flight Center

Unmanned Antares rocket explodes on launch = An alarm! Oh! No! End result's an unexpected conk!

(by Maurice Goddard)