Spanish bullfighter gored in groin leaving testicle 'eviscerated' at San Isidro festival in Madrid = Agile steer charged matador, intent on piercing his balls. Idiot fell, is given first aid and survives
Obama approves sending up to four hundred and fifty more US troops to Iraq = President's for moving a thousand equipped army troops out abroad for fun.
Christopher Lee, horror master and renowned film villain, dies at ninety three = In his prime, and when elderly, rave actor instilled terror into hearts of men, eh?
The NY prisoners = In the pens? Sorry...
The two escaped prisoners from New York = Word to press: cops know they remain free.
Two prisoners and their escape from a New York prison, "Little Siberia" = "Partners in crime" freed with power tools in a risky area? Not possible!