China 'expels' French journalist over Uighur article

(BBC)

The French journalist Ursula Gauthier = Uighur race - an untruth, jest or half lies?

(by Julian Lofts)

Christmas Cooking With Emeril Lagasse

(Yahoo!)

Photo: Lord Mariser

The Christmas cooking = Gastronomic kitsch, eh?

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Fare fight - trouble on the streets

(The New Zealand Herald)

Photo: Tim Rich & Lesley Katon

Uber lot = trouble

(by Robert Jordan)

Vladimir Putin Goes Shirtless Again For New 2016 Calendar

(Huffington Post)

Vladimir Putin goes shirtless again for new year's calendar = Women find aging Russian satyr leader has virile pectorals = Gay men fawn, adoring this virile Russian leader's pectorals

(by Jason Lofts)

World's fattest man Andres Moreno Sepulveda dies of heart failure, age 38

(Stuff.co.nz)

The monstrous Mexican Andres Moreno Sepulveda = Poor immense senor couldn't have sex. Trauma ends.

(by Julian Lofts)

The Mexican Andres Moreno Sepulveda = Enormous man expired, leaved a stench

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Archbishop Justin Welby says Isis 'apocalypse' threatens Christians with 'elimination' in religion's birthplace

(The Independent)

Photo: CREDITS

Islamic State "apocalypse" = Slay people as aim/tactics

(by Jason Lofts)

Madame Claude, brothel-keeper - obituary

(The Daily Telegraph)

Fernande Grudet (also known as Madame Claude) dies - the Telegraph's obituary follows = A famous, astute, female brothel owner's deeds. O, an orgy with naked, call girls' pudenda!

(by Julian Lofts)

New species, the ninja lanternshark, discovered

(CNN)

It's Etmopterus benchleyi alias 'ninja lanternshark' = Listen, black "Japanese" manhunter is in reality short

(by Jason Lofts)

NORAD tracks Santa's journey

(MSN)

Photo: Danny Sullivan

NORAD tracks Santa's journey = Sky sojourn ran, traced Santa

(by Russ Atkinson)

Facebook users solve mystery of 'ancient' relic unearthed in Jerusalem

(The Guardian)

Photo: Bio-Energy Systems

Rabbis seem wise re: ~ Weber Isis Beamers

(by Julian Lofts)

Here's How Neil deGrasse Tyson Tried to Completely Ruin Star Wars

(Time)

Who is planetarium director Neil deGrasse Tyson? = Hey, I learned inept cosmologist ruined Star Wars

(by Julian Lofts)

Google Pairs With Ford To Build Self-Driving Cars

(Yahoo!)

Photo: Lars Plougmann

Google/Ford ~ forged logo

(by Robert Jordan)

Miss Universe pageant host Steve Harvey makes huge gaffe, names wrong winner

(Fox News)

Miss Universe contest host Steve Harvey = Not savvy emcee. He errs. TV insists "He's out!"

(by Julian Lofts)

A modest approach to settling the Israeli-Palestinian conflict

(Washington Post)

Photo: Yossi Gurvitz

The Israeli-Palestinian conflict = If no alliance, the split is certain

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Sanders Apologizes to Hillary over data breach

(ABC News)

Caricature: DonkeyHotey

Sanders Apologizes to Hillary over data breach = Oh, the poor, crazy liberal's raids lose advantage

(by Russ Atkinson)

Prince Ali demands FIFA 'join 21st century'

(Channel NewsAsia)

Photo: Doha Stadium Plus Qatar

FIFA presidential hopeful Prince Ali Bin Al Hussein = The Arab is in line-up as fill-in for unideal chief Sepp

(by Jason Lofts)

Does going into hospital make you sick?

(BBC)

Photo: Abel Pardo López

Post-hospital syndrome = Sloppy NHS^* readmits too
*National Health Service (UK)

(by Julian Lofts)

Melissa Rivers Portrays Late Mom Joan Rivers in Joy

(US Magazine)

Photo: Mainstream

"The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband." - The late Joan Rivers = An original joke how she didn't want to confront her transvestite man inside in nothing but her crimson mesh tights

(by Jason Lofts)

And a Partridge in a Cramped Cage ...

(Huffington Post)

Photo: Karunakar Rayker

Gad! Maid a dancing, pear tree crap ~ and a partridge in a cramped cage

(by Robert Jordan)

Are plus-size models making our women obese?

(Fox News)

Photo: vangelisian

Are plus-size models making our women obese? = Unlike some, gals desire no wee bazooms, rump

(by Russ Atkinson)