Here's More Amazing Footage of Blake Lively Fighting a Shark

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What are we going to call Bill Clinton if Hillary is elected president?

(USA Today)

What are we going to call Bill Clinton if Hillary is elected president? = I'll be calling on "First Lad". "Clinton" collides with the pair. We agree yet?

Anagram: Josiah Winslow

'Never Gonna Give You Up' singer Rick Astley releases first album in a decade

(Malay Mail Online)

'Never Gonna Give You Up' singer Rick Astley releases first album in a decade = After Rickrolling everyone, a dud gave us a superb single. Many see it as nice.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow

The Future of the BBC

(Huffington Post)

The Future of the BBC = Rot, Huff, cut the Beeb

Anagram: Robert Jordan, Photo: chiefmoamba Follow

Kimbo Slice dies at age 42

(ESPN)

Kimbo Slice has died = His bed is claimed. K.O.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow

Donald Trump coming to Dallas, Houston and San Antonio next week

(The Dallas Morning News)

Donald Trump coming to Dallas, Houston and San Antonio next week = Upon nomination end, the conman would ask to tax, and gets dollars.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow, Photo: montegoodyk

Contest winners earn stage performances with Tafelmusik

(Toronto Star)

Why do the nations so furiously rage together, and why do the people imagine a vain thing? The kings of the earth rise up, and the rulers take counsel together against the Lord, and against His Anointed.=Donald Trump's a hedonist, a Frankenstein and a ranting pettifogger who won't listen to reason. Do you think he is the ideal POTUS? Ugh, his rug ('hair')! Oh yeah, it's vile! Can't they gag the degenerate arsehole?

Anagram: Julian Lofts, Photo: IseFire

GOP to Trump: Stop alienating Latinos

(CNN)

GOP to Trump: Stop alienating Latinos = I get plan to toss migrant population

Anagram: Josiah Winslow

Novak Djokovic beats Andy Murray to win French Open

(BBC)

Novak Djokovic betters Andy Murray to win the French Tennis Open tournament at last = Lanky Serbian "Joker" wins. Hard on tyro Scot. Much vaunted feat, top entertainment on TV.

Anagram: Julian Lofts

"Fountain of Youth" Pill Could Be a Reality Sooner Than You'd Think

(Yahoo!)

"Fountain of Youth" Pill = Any flu? Oh, put it in, fool!

Anagram: Aronas Pinchas, Photo: Ken Banks

Norway becomes first country in the world to commit to zero deforestation

(The Independent)

Zero deforestation is ~ a forested zone or is it?

Anagram: Julian Lofts, Photo: dan.kristiansen

Reviewing the 2016 Presidential Race

(WWL AM)

Who, may I ask, will be elected in as our President? = Beware...we see Donald Trump, his action is likely = I said, "Make Hillary Clinton use power! We'd be set!" = Bernie Sanders' policies would let him take way = Well, we'd seriously keep nicest Obama in a third! = To pick one leader by wit is hard; all seem unwise.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow, Illustration: DonkeyHotey

First lady Obama takes swipe at Trump

(Fox News)

First lady Obama takes swipe at Trump = "Let's strip away mistake of a dumb trap!"

Anagram: Josiah Winslow

Trump on black supporter: 'Look at my African-American over here'

(CNN)

'Look at my African-American over here' = In it, a mean, heavy remark of race/color.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow, Illustration: DonkeyHotey

Sanders: 'The Democratic National Convention will be a contested convention'

(CNN)

Sanders: 'The Democratic National Convention will be a contested convention' = Clinton can't win. Soon, I'll convince the nation, and create deserved boost at me.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow, Image: angela.thompson

Boxing legend Muhammad Ali dies at 74

(USA Today)

That sports legend, i.e. the true maestro of the boxing ring, Muhammad Ali, dies = "I am the greatest of all time!" He's this goddamned giant. Mourn the US boxer. RIP.

Anagram: Julian Lofts, Photo: Exchanges Photos

Why Politicians Are Like Diapers

(The Telegram & Gazette)

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason = Donald Trump: He's an arrogant (beep) cheesy nuisance. Hillary Rodham Clinton: She's going to be voted in ahead of him.

Anagram: Jason Lofts, Illustration: EN2008

NRA attacks Clinton over gun control

(The Hill)

NRA attacks Clinton over gun control=Can grant cover to kill? No. Can trust? No.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow, Photo: Ulkoministeriö

Donald Trump tweeted out 9 graphs proving that Obama failed. We fact-checked them.

(Washington Post)

Donald Trump tweeted out nine graphs proving that Obama failed. We fact-checked them. = Development: doubted data in this cropped chart. Awful whine attack from the mean egg.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow, Illustration: A.Davey

Mexican bullfighter 'El Pana' dies a month after being gored

(The Guardian)

The Mexican bullfighter 'El Pana' has died a month after being gored = Tetraplegic matador's in a fix, feeling unable to be mended. Arghhhh!

Anagram: Julian Lofts