San Diego Catholic church says devil works through Hillary Clinton

(Yahoo!)

San Diego Catholic church says devil works through Hillary Clinton = Shocking words: Hurry, choosing that lady is actual hell, chronic evil!

Anagram: Aronas Pinchas
Photo: Karen

Poll Worker Injured By Trump Sign Booby-Trapped With Razor Blades

(Huffington Post)

Poll Worker Injured By Trump Sign Booby-Trapped With Razor Blades = When bizarre morbid jerks truly want pure blood drops, apply bigot

Anagram: Christopher Davis

Pope Francis says the Catholic Church will probably never have female priests

(Washington Post)

Pope Francis says the Catholic Church will probably never have female priests = Blunt chap has policy answer: Hierarchy of celibate cripples favor themselves!

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Photo: Paval Hadzinski

Also see:
Cardinal George Pell has to resign, or Pope Francis must act
Pope Francis picks Lionel Messi over Maradona and Pele as best player ever

Units of measure are getting a fundamental upgrade

(ScienceNews)

Units of measure are getting a fundamental upgrade = Gauge gurus meet up, draft, and name fine alterations

Anagram: Christopher Davis
Photo: Helga Weber

Samsung to cripple Galaxy Note7 replacement smartphones as total recall continues

(News.com.au)

The Samsung Galaxy Note Seven = HUGE nasty snag vexes men a lot!

Anagram: Adie Pena
Photo: iphonedigital

Also see:
Samsung scraps Galaxy Note 7 over fire concerns

Chicago Cubs beat Cleveland Indians to win first World Series title since 1908

(The Guardian)

The Chicago Cubs beat the Cleveland Indians to win World Series = How it's given a renewed chance to ditch its old curse in baseball!

Anagram: Adie Pena
Photo: Cindy Mc

Also see:
The latest Cubs curse? His name is Corey Kluber

Real Life Cowboy Lassoes Thief in Walmart Parking Lot

(Country Rebel)

Real life cowboy lassoes thief in Walmart parking lot = Fellow on horseback ropes a man. Wait--first, illegality!

Anagram: Dharam

Also see:
Rancher lassoes thief
Emu lassoed on Arizona highway

Anthony Weiner has checked into a SEX ADDICTION treatment center

(Daily Mail)

Photo: Azi Paybarah

Anthony David Weiner = We aid horny 'n' deviant

Anagram: Aronas Pinchas

Former congressman Anthony Weiner checks into rehab = Women on case - henceforth man regrets horny sick brain

Anagram: Christopher Davis

New Hampshire State law allows firearms at polling places

(WMUR9)

New Hampshire State law allows firearms at polling places=Per same political answer, almost was... well - a shrapnel fight

Anagram: Christopher Davis
Image: saragoldsmith

Putin cultivated Trump for years - spy

(The New Zealand Herald)

Republican candidates = Putin discerned a cabal

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: James Gill

Defects in diamonds could create the next generation of hard drives

(RT)

Defects in diamonds could create the next generation of hard drives = IT science method solved need. I can't afford extra hundred in storage

Anagram: Christopher Davis
Photo: Lane Pearman

Patient's fart blamed for fire, burnt body

(The New Zealand Herald)

A patient's putrid intestinal gas is blamed for the fire ~ in an operating theatre. "Is a bum's pitfall", testified Drs.

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Photo: Charles LeBlanc

Russia has a grand plan to undermine the West's democracies -- and it's working

(Business Insider)

Russia has a grand plan to undermine the West's democracies = Putin (he runs Red, restless head) and Moscow against America

Anagram: Aronas Pinchas
Caricature: DonkeyHotey

Trump supporter charged with voting twice in Iowa

(Washington Post)

Trump supporter charged with voting twice in Iowa = Rigged... with a Trump vote... a power-punch ironic twist

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Photo: IoSonoUnaFotoCamera

The latest Cubs curse? His name is Corey Kluber

(ESPN)

The Chicago Cubs World Series = Score which leads to big curse

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Photo: Arturo Pardavila III

Iceland's Pirate Party Loves Hackers, Drugs & Revolution

(The Daily Beast)

Iceland's Pirate Party ≠ is a credit, apparently

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Democracy Chronicles

Trump booted a black man from his rally and called him a 'thug.' Turns out he is a supporter.

(Washington Post)

Trump booted a black man from his rally and called him a 'thug'. Turns out he is a supporter. = Stupid rumour made me laugh hard at it. Ben Carson's the only black support for him at all!

Anagram: Josiah Winslow

Donald Trump jokes about canceling the election and making him president. Cue outrage.

(Washington Post)

Donald Trump jokes about canceling the election and making him president. Cue outrage. = Belt muck! Egomaniac jerk's an out-and-out complete unhinged Hitlerian despotic danger!

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Photo: Alan

Professor who's correctly called every presidential election since 1984 predicts Trump will win

(Yahoo!)

Expert forecasts Trumps presidential win = Politics-man - twit preferred as next US Pres.! = Complaint is - twit preferred as next US Pres.!

Anagram: Aronas Pinchas
Photo: torbakhopper

'This Changes Everything': Donald Trump Exults as Hillary Clinton’s Team Scrambles

(The New York Times)

'This Changes Everything': Donald Trump Exults as Hillary Clinton's Team Scrambles = Then many regard this cuss-smelling, smut-lethal varlet, xenophobic, sly, and racist.

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Photo: Colleen P