Trump's latest executive order: Banning people from 7 countries and more

(CNN)

Trump's latest executive order: Banning people from seven countries and more = True, most get moved...*pause*...except culprits from San Bernardino or Nine-Eleven

Note: The San Bernardino and 9/11 attacks are highly referenced by Trump as examples of why a Muslim ban might be necessary.

The seven countries that Trump has on his list so far are Iraq, Syria, Iran, Libya, Somalia, Sudan and Yemen. Remember that list.

15 of the 19 hijackers in the 9/11 attacks were citizens of Saudi Arabia, 2 were from the United Arab Emirates, 1 was from Egypt, and 1 was from Lebanon. The perpetrators of the San Bernardino attacks were Tashfeen Malik and Rizwan Farook. Tashfeen Malik was born in Pakistan, and Rizwan Farook was born in...Chicago, Illinois.

If you paid attention, exactly 0 of these countries were on Trump's initial list. However, he is currently leader of one of those countries.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Image: Rob Walsh

How Donald Trump, Theresa May are the 2017 version of '80s power couple Reagan-Thatcher

(USA Today)

Two Odd Couples: (President of the United States of America, British Prime Minister) Ronald Reagan and Maggie Thatcher Donald Trump and Theresa Mary May

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"Gipper" actor had dementia "Iron Lady" - horrid shrill termagant Fornicator, madman, nut. Deranged ape tweets to fume "Maybe" - unsophisticated 'headmistress'.

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Karl-Ludwig Poggemann

You're a victim with one word in 'Can you hear me?' phone scam

(USA Today)

"Can you hear me?" scam warning = Ring came once? Sham! Run away!

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Image: Nathan Rupert

John Hurt obituary

(The Guardian)

Eminent English actor Sir John Vincent Hurt has died = John Hurt's riveting roles did enchant in the cinemas

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Sam

Starbucks: Crowded stores turned off customers

(USA Today)

Starbucks: Crowded stores turned off customers = Rest, drunkard sorts, succumbed to worst coffees

Anagram: Madhu Rao
Image: Jim McDonough

Did Sean Spicer Tweet Out His Password?

(Snopes.com)

Did Sean Spicer Tweet Out His Password? = Shrewd code snippet was tied to Russia.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow

City council swears-in super hero ... kind of

(CNN)

San Jose Councilman Lan Diep's superheroic oath = Oh, son's lone shield conjures up Captain America.

Anagram: Rosie Perera

Swipe left on a baby? Adoption app

(MSN)

Swipe left on a baby? Adoption app = Baby poops? Fat? Not in wide appeal

Anagram: Russ Atkinson
Image: nik_donna

Chicago leaders respond to Trump's 'I will send the Feds!' tweet about violence

(ABC7 Chicago)

'If Chicago doesn't fix the horrible "carnage" going on, 228 shootings in 2017 with 42 killings (up 24% from 2016), I will send in the Feds!' = Exact shooting figure: 248, which is down 16.2% (+/- .2%) going in 2017, and less killed. ...no pain...it's comforting he'll finish before 2024, right?
(According to this page, these numbers were accurate at the time of composition of this anagram. Also, as an extra constraint, each number from the original is also anagrammed into real statistics.)

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Image: Stephen Melkisethian

Ten traits of highly intelligent people

(The New Zealand Herald)

Ten Surprising Traits of Intelligent People 1. They're left-handed 2. Are messy 3. Swear a lot 4. Make people laugh 5. Stay up late 6. Didn't have sex in teenage years 7. Have worries 8. They tend to be modest 9. Are a cat person 10. Are an older sibling

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Features of Extra-talented and Skilled Person 1. A southpaw 2. Dirty 3. Blaspheme 4. A comedian 5. Not sleepy 6. A virginal youth - no entanglements 7. Easily agitated 8. Hate hype, are proper 9. Sensitive, gentle 10. Elder brother/sister We agree.

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: A Health Blog

Watch live: President Trump speaks at the Department of Homeland Security

(Los Angeles Times)

The Department of Homeland Security is really meant to ~ protect a tardy US from enemies. Yeah, don't let them all in!

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Steve Rhodes

Donald Trump, imperialist: Forget "isolationism" - Trump longs to build up our military and then use it

(Salon)

Donald Trump, imperialist: Forget "isolationism" - Trump longs to build up our military and then use it = Self-important, impetuous, pompous, delirious, horrid, budding tyrant is ultimate malignant ill rot

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: Mr Wonderful

Donald Trump: All the false claims 45th President has made since his inauguration

(The Independent)

The forty-fifth American president = They differ in important facts here!

Anagram: Adie Pena

Inflatable 'Trump' rooster orders overwhelm Chinese factory

(BBC)

Chinese inflatable 'Trump' rooster = It lampoons rich, tense, feral brute

Anagram: Julian Lofts

Goodfellas: Martin Scorsese's self-reflecting masterpiece

(iNews)

Goodfellas: Martin Scorsese's self-reflecting masterpiece = "Casino" director's ace film - Feel gangsters lose self-tempers

Anagram: Madhu

Sean Spicer's second briefing still contained a whopper

(Poynter)

Sean Spicer's second briefing still contained a whopper = A rapid slip, being proof conscience ends when lies start!

Anagram: Dharam

Samuel Adams on current president

(Wordsmith.org)

If ever the time should come, when vain and aspiring men shall possess the highest seats in government, our country will stand in need of its experienced patriots to prevent its ruin. -Samuel Adams, revolutionary
=
Donald Trump's inherently the seediest, most egregious, unfit psychopath. O, he is an overt vulturine moron and has exceptional egomania. The Trump's vain trendsetter Slovenian wife is well versed in narcissism.

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Dave L

'Alternative Facts' and the Costs of Trump-Branded Reality

(The New York Times)

'Alternative facts' = An evil statecraft

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Philip Cohen

Trump says 'day one' of his administration will be Monday, not his inauguration

(Philly.com)

Trump says 'day one' of his administration will be Monday, not his inauguration = It is false and unamusing (only upon an oath!). I'm worried, as it's in my birthday, too!

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Image: Francisco Daum

East Coast, California brace for powerful storms

(CNN)

East Coast, California brace for powerful storms = Oops! Air blasts ruffle two Corners of America. Act!

Anagram: Madhu
Image: Random Retail