Beef Salmonella Outbreak: Here's Which Stores to Worry About

(Yahoo!)

The beef salmonella outbreak = Uneatable meat or flesh, bloke!

Anagram: Pinchas Aronas
Image: Rocky Mountain Laboratories, NIAID, NIH

Melania Trump Raises Eyebrows in Africa With Another White Hat

(The New York Times)

Melania channels Meryl Streep in the dated film "Out of Africa" = Merriment as a fey alien FLOTUS donned a farcical pith helmet

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: The White House

Vladimir Putin Goes Bare-Chested (Again) For 2019 Calendar

(Huffington Post)
Embed from Getty Images

Vladimir Putin goes bare-chested (again) for 2019 calendar = Red dictator revealing familiar enough pecs and abs

Anagram: Jason Lofts

Presidential Alert Goes to Millions of Cellphones Across the US

(The New York Times)

The Presidential alert = That inept leader riles

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Thomas Cizauskas

Chile abuse priest Fernando Karadima removed by Vatican

(BBC)
Embed from Getty Images

Chile abuse priest Fernando Karadima removed by Vatican = Named Latin American party's behavior abusive, defrocked

Anagram: Jason Lofts

Elon Musk agrees to resign as Tesla chairman in settlement with SEC

(TechCrunch)

The chairman of US carmaker Tesla resigns over SEC federal law violation complaint = Charismatic, arrogant, overassertive Elon Musk. He is a compliant felon. Farewell cad

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Thomas Hawk

'They fricken hate her': Full Emma Alberici email shows Justin Milne was not taken out of context

(The Canberra Times)

A man named, Justin Milne, officially resigns as the acing ABC Chairman = Damn email in Justin's office gets ill, aching chairman a scary ban. Amen.

Anagram: George Missailidis

'Free Solo' trailer teases Alex Honnold's journey up El Cap

(snews)

The American ropeless solo climber Alex Honnold = Lad's role: excels on incomparable sheer monolith

Anagram: Jason Lofts

Chile unveils Patagonian Route of Parks hiking trail

(BBC)

Chile unveiled the Patagonian Route of Parks = People do covet nature, fauna, hiking trails, eh?

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Mariano Mantel

Trump brags at UN, crowd laughs

Trump brags at UN, crowd laughs = braggart, plus was much rotund

Anagram: Russ Atkinson

UN members laugh at Trump after claim his administration has 'accomplished more than almost any in US history'

(The Independent)

"In less than two years, my administration has accomplished more than almost any administration in the history of our country," says President Trump
=
Hmm, utter nonsense, a myth! An asinine fool, liar, moron, idiot, spy! Oh listen, why can't a psychiatrist treat your hatred, narcissism, and toadyism, Mr POTUS?

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Thomas Cizauskas

Who Is Renate Dolphin? Woman Behind "Renate Alumnus" in Kavanaugh Yearbook Withdraws Support for Judge

(Newsweek)

Renate Alumnus = Alas, men, untrue

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Lorie Shaull

Mary Kay Letourneau On Affair With 12-Year-Old: "I Didn't Know It Was A Crime"

(Yahoo!)

Notorious pedophile Mary Kay Letourneau = O, you rape and pain our youth like molester!

Anagram: Pinchas Aronas

Bill Cosby sentenced to state prison for sexual assault

(BBC)

Punish busted entertainer Bill Cosby = Put insolent US celebrity behind bars

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Montgomery County Planning Commission

Donald Trump Just Got Laughed At By The Entire United Nations

(Huffington Post)

The President of the United States of America Donald Trump = Potentate's speech to UN dreadful, instead it made for mirth!

Anagram: Jason Lofts

The Woman's Fatal Selfie

(ABC15)

The Woman's Fatal Selfie = She falls. Wait ...fate? Omen?

Anagram: Russ Atkinson
Image: Tony Webster

Storm Ali: two killed as 100 mph winds lash UK and Ireland

(The Guardian)

Storm Ali ~ is mortal

Anagram: Jason Lofts
Image: Martyn Fletcher

Brett Kavanaugh nomination: Trump challenges accuser

(BBC)

1. Professor Christine Blasey Ford appeals the nomination of the United States Supreme Court 2. Judge Brett Kavanaugh 3. President Donald Trump

=

1. "A student pervert tried to fondle and rape me!" 2. No justice for us, Republicans think 3. The trotters of a pig, Yeti pubes and a mushroom-shaped glans

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Lorie Shaull

The Most Horrified Reactions to Trump's Dick Allegedly Looking Like Toad

(Vice)

Toadstool = Toad's tool

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: jacinta lluch valero

Strawberry needle scare: strict new export rules put in place

(The Guardian)

The Queensland Strawberry Growers Association = Needles sow terror! So what? Big scary quarantines! = Sow terror with needle! Gross! Bananas! Quite scary!

Anagram: Chris Sturdy
Image: Ahmed Helal