Emergency crews sing 'Happy Birthday' to Dr. Fauci

(NBC News)

Our best wishes to the octogenarian Doctor Anthony Fauci
=
But who? Fantastic US hero, a geriatric doyen - oho, no contest!

Anagram: Julian Lofts

Don't Tell Your Kids About Santa

(Friendly Atheist)

Don't Tell Your Kids About Santa
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Look, it's undoubtedly Satan. Rat!
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Look out, standard but nasty lie!

Anagrams: Russ Atkinson, Aronas Pinchas
Image: Gary Watts

It Was All A Lie by Stuart Stevens

Santa Claus rescued from power lines while making parachute candy deliver

(WFLA)

Santa Claus rescued from power lines while making parachute candy delivery
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Rudolph's new name? Sparky! "I feel ashamed..." Wiry voltages incur a cruel accident.

Anagram: Steve Allison

Trump goes on a rampage with pardons, veto threats and Covid denial

(CNN)

Snide Trump approves ~ presumptive pardons

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Duncan C

Hawaii residents told to stay home as Kilauea volcano erupts

(CNN)

Hawaii residents told to stay home as Kilauea volcano erupts
=
Sky, rain, sea. Hot lava, ash, pumice and sterile soot, too. A wilt due.

Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Ninian Reid

As end approaches, Trump gets doses of flattery, finality

(ABC News)

As end approaches, Trump gets doses of flattery, finality
=
Fact: GOP's fatty "Dear Leader" suns himself on potty praise!

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: FolsomNatural

The first Canadian astronaut

(Reuters)

The first Canadian astronaut ~ can start shared infatuation

Anagram: Russ Atkinson
Image: NASA Johnson

Suboptimal US Response to COVID-19 Despite Robust Capabilities and Resources

(JAMA)

Some Nations Battling COVID Infection 1. The United States of America 2. Sweden 3. Italy 4. China 5. Australia 6. United Kingdom

=

1. Fucked 2. Tried herd immunity - a debacle 3. Devastation 4. Stonewalling causation 5. Hesitation 6. Nation’s stigma Confine it!

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Marco Verch

Japan's Pajama Suit helps teleworkers look good for Zoom calls

(Reuters)

Japan's Pajama Suit helps teleworkers look good for Zoom calls
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A promo shows snooze apparel just like all good formal jackets.

Anagram: Dharam
Image: Asamblea Nacional

The Electoral College is voting to cement Joe Biden's victory over Trump

(CNBC)

The Electoral College is voting to cement Joe Biden's victory over Trump
=
Elect moving choice over a vilest, jeering, rotten-to-petty, cold loser bum.

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: Jeff Gates

The US election and the age of dreampolitik

(The New York Times)

The US elections and the age of Dreampolitik
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Hotheaded ace felon Trump seeks litigation

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Jeff Gates

A filter made for astronaut urine could soon be providing drinking water on Earth

(CNN)

A filter made for astronaut urine could soon be providing drinking water on Earth
=
Uh, I don't want to drink astronaut urine! No go. Cold lemonade? Brrr... is pee-giver affair!

Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Steve P2008

GOP Senator Says 'Country First' as Electoral College to Meet

(Bloomberg)

GOP Senator Says 'Country First' as Electoral College to Meet
=
So yell it close to Trump's nasty ego-rotten glare-coarse face!

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: Amaury Laporte

Treasure Washes Up on Venezuela’s Shore

(The New York Times)

Treasure Washes Up on Venezuela’s Shore
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unshaven use sheer zeal, swoop treasure

Anagram: Russ Atkinson
Image: Stig Nygaard

Donald Trump to be 'one of the worst' presidents in history, say 42 percent of Americans

(Newshub)

Donald Trump to be 'one of the worst' presidents in history
=
Stupidest twit, nonprofessional tyro, dethroned hombre

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Amaury Laporte

Jerrold M. Post, Specialist in Political Psychology, Dies

(The New York Times)

Jerrold M. Post, Specialist in Political Psychology and an author, dies
=
So, analysed loopy politicos - Trump (griper), Clinton (lech), Sadat, jihadis

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: usstratcom

Biden and Harris named Time's Person of the Year

(BBC)

Time unveils the Persons of the Year: Biden and Harris
=
Doyen, heroine. Banish fiend Trump, arrest the vile ass!

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Time

Ivanka Trump ‘Not Wanted’ posters appear across New York City

(The Independent)

Two ardent pests on ~ Not Wanted posters = Two star deponents

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Twitter

Melania Trump just wants to go home

(CNN)

Melania Trump just wants to go home
=
A ma uptown mourns - get a jet! Him? Lost!

Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Anthony Quintano