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Wednesday, January 13, 2021

Trump Takes A Last Look At His Border Wall As Congress Considers Impeachment

(National Public Radio)
Protest at Trump Tower, New York City, 29 December 2018

Trump Takes A Last Look At His Border Wall As Congress Considers Impeachment
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Good lad!? The wall can't keep back prosecutors & harassers, Mr T. A loss is imminent.
Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Chris Beckett

Two Capitol Police officers suspended; ten more under investigation

(CNN)
U.S. Capitol Police are nothing but Keystone Cops

Two Capitol Police officers suspended; ten more under investigation
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Cops were too unfit; caused sedition. "Cripple government!" No, it's failed.
Anagram: Russ Atkinson
Image: Tim Evanson

Chad Wolf has resigned as acting secretary for the Homeland Security Department

(The New York Times)
Secretario interino Chad Wolf visita Panamá.

Chad Wolf has resigned as acting secretary for the Homeland Security Department
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"Secret" man (a wolf in sheep's clothing): "Mad scary guy threatened - Fired! Charred toast!"
Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: US Embassy Panama

Monday, January 11, 2021

Split in two: magicians to celebrate 100 years of sawing people in half

(The Guardian)
Lindsey's turn to be magically sawed in half

Magicians to celebrate one hundred years of sawing people in half
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An alarmingly realistic epic bondage - no-one suffers death, we hope!
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: VSPYCC

QAnon Believers Were Part Of Mob That Stormed The Capitol

(BuzzFeed)
Stop The Steal

Conspiracy theory
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A hypnotic sorcery
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Sycophancy rioter
Anagram: Pamela
Image: Chad Davis

‘Trump blows up US democracy’: the world watches on in horror

(The Guardian)
IMG_2637

“Trump blows up American democracy. A day that will go down in history. A president to be thrown in the dustbin of history,” says South American political commentator Eliane Cantanhede
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A coup d’etat stunt in the Capitol by domestic terrorists and macho counterforces who worship and obey an amoral, mentally ill bigot, a naysayer who didn’t win. Impeach him! Entertain us!
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Backbone Campaign

Donald Trump awards Annika Sorenstam, Gary Player Presidential Medal of Freedom

(INSERT_NEWSPAPER_NAME)
While G20 Leaders Fight COVID-19, Trump Plays Golf

Three of the US Presidential Medal of Freedom recipients today
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I seethe for addled Trump prefers to deify ‘Hole in one’ catamites
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Mike Licht

President Trump Confirms He Will Not Attend President-elect Biden's Inauguration

(Town & Country)
Trump is guilty

President Trump confirms he will not attend Biden's inauguration
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Mad funambulist plotting another insurrection/predestined win
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: TheTurducken

Trump's desperate attempt to save his imploding presidency

(CNN)
Trump rat

Trump's desperate attempt to save his imploding presidency
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Press: Dignity and respect are lost. Past time to dump him! Veep?
Anagram: Dharam
Image: TheTurducken

Friday, January 8, 2021

Calls intensify to remove Trump from office even as he acknowledges ‘a new administration’

(Washington Post)
Trump

Calls intensify to remove Trump from presidential office
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Effective immediately for insurrection plots from plans
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: IoSonoUnaFotoCamera

Jack Ma disappears from his own talent show

(Financial Times)
Jack Ma speaks at the Official Launch of Electronic World Trade Platform (eWTP) Africa | Kigali, 31 October 2018

Mister Ma disappears from his own Chinese reality talent show
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He worships fame. Honestly, it’s a crime. Was maltreated in prison
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Paul Kagame

Pastor’s battle with two great white sharks is heaven sent

(USA Today)
Shark

Pastor’s battle with two great white sharks is heaven sent
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Eek! Theater & higher vows: Pastor's battle with Satan's twins!
Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Nathan Rupert

Trump supporters to hold rally in US Capital on Jan 6 to protest election result

(Business World)
Capitol Jan 6

The BIG Protest Rally in Washington, DC: Stop The Steal!
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Let’s thwart the psycho loser plotting against Biden
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Blink O'fanaye

Thursday, January 7, 2021

‘Trump blows up US democracy’: the world watches on in horror

(The Guardian)
Trump nearly had some believing

“Trump blows up American democracy. A day that will go down in history. A president to be thrown in the dustbin of history,” says South American political commentator Eliane Cantanhede
=
A coup d’etat stunt in the Capitol by domestic terrorists and macho counterforces who worship and obey an amoral, mentally ill bigot, a naysayer who didn’t win. Impeach him! Entertain us!
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Mike Finn

Is Dairy Farming Cruel to Cows?

(The New York Times)

Is Dairy Farming Cruel to Cows?
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Grimy cow, calf. Sad routine, sir!
Anagram: Steve Allison

Sunday, January 3, 2021

US Secret Service codenames selected for Presidents, Vice Presidents and their family members

United States Secret Service

Some of the US Secret Service codenames selected for Presidents, Vice Presidents and their family members:
1. Biden
2. Harris
3. Trump
4. Melania
5. Ivanka
6. Pence
7. Clinton
8. Hillary
9. Chelsea
10. Reagan
11. Obama
12. Michelle
13. Sasha
14. Kennedy
15. Ford
16. George H.W. Bush
17. George W. Bush
18. Carter
19. Agnew
20. Gore
= VIPs’ strange, daft, harsh, bombastic (Mr T’s insane he feels cheated), highly comedic nicknames:
1. Celtic
2. Pioneer
3. Mogul
4. Muse
5. Marvel
6. Hoosier
7. Eagle
8. Evergreen
9. Energy
10. Rawhide
11. Renegade
12. Renaissance
13. Rosebud
14. Lancer
15. Passkey
16. Timberwolf
17. Tumbler
18. Deacon
19. Pathfinder
20. Sawhorse
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Thomas Hawk

Thursday, December 31, 2020

Fed Judge Says 'Criminal' Trump Only Pardons Republicans, Child Murderer Or Turkey

(Newsweek)
Trump's Dishonor Roll

"It's not surprising that a criminal like Trump pardons other criminals," senior United States District Federal Judge Robert Pratt of the Southern District of Iowa said on Tuesday. "But apparently to get a pardon, one has to be either a Republican, a convicted child murderer or a turkey."
=
That apish tyrant relished absolution of turpitude: Roger Stone, Paul Manafort, Charles Kushner, Blackwater security contractors in penitentiaries. The horrid megalomaniac, purporting to be POTUS, subverted and jeopardised democracy. It isn’t adult, I find it is retarded, I retort!
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Alex McCrae

Wednesday, December 30, 2020

French fashion designer Pierre Cardin dies, aged 98

(The New Zealand Herald)
Pierre Cardin

The fashion designer Pierre Cardin
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Pioneering thread franchiser dies
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Budiey

Eminent Chomsky Says Trump a 'Sociopathic Megalomaniac'

(Common Dreams)
Give Up The Ball, Donny

Four years with an unhinged 'Sociopathic Megalomaniac' in power
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Legacy of paranoiac, Trump, incriminated in heinous hogwash woe.
Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: Powell Burns

Hilaria Baldwin admits fake Spanish accent, real name

(Eminetra)
Hilaria Thomas; Alec Baldwin

What's the most risible Hispanic edition of Blackface?
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So meet Hilaria Baldwin, accept it is kibosh, then scoff
Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Joella Marano