Brand New Florida GOP Rep. Cory Mills Jokes About Vicious Attack On Paul Pelosi

(Huffington Post)

Brand New Florida GOP Rep. Cory Mills Jokes About Vicious Attack On Paul Pelosi
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A bad Republican politician posts junk "gay lover" claim to spouse of old worker.

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Image: Wikimedia

Can the UK's race to space take off?

(BBC)

Can the UK's race to space take off?
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No! Rockets efface cash at uptake

Anagram: Robert Jordan
Image: Number 10

McCarthy Wins Speakership on 15th Attempt, Breaking Historic Impasse after Late-Night Drama

(National Review)

McCarthy Wins Speakership
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A yachtsmen’s shipwreck - RIP

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: DonkeyHotey

Here are the Republican alternatives for speaker if McCarthy's bid falls through

(Fox News)

Here are the Republican alternatives for speaker if McCarthy's bid falls through
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The right preferred Scalise or Stefanik hire by far, but Trump'll also have a chance...

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Image: GPA Photo Archive

As legal pot grows, more kids sickened by edibles at home

(AP News)

As legal pot grows, more kids sickened by edibles at home
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Make some weed dish OK! Congress'd probably legislate it

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Image: Elsa Olofsson

Brazilian Authorities Will Revive Fraud Case Against George Santos

(The New York Times)

Brazilian Authorities Will Revive Fraud Case Against George Santos
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Ages ago, a liar realized fault via his actions, but now tries reversing!

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Image: Trong Khiem Nguyen

Bills’ Hamlin collapses on field, gets CPR; game suspended

(AP News)

Bills’ Hamlin collapses on field, gets CPR; game suspended
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Big man collides, clips helmet, falls deep, ends up on grass

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Image: TigerNet.com

A Heavily Armed Man Caused Panic at a Supermarket. But Did He Break the Law?

(The New York Times)

A Heavily Armed Man Caused Panic at a Supermarket. But Did He Break the Law?
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A peculiar buyer with a musket never made a threat, and lacked a bad mishap

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Image: Brian Hart

Bolsonaro lands in Florida, avoiding handover of power to leftist Lula

(NBC News)

Bolsonaro lands in Florida, avoiding handover of power to leftist Lula
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“I lost!” Vulgar poor loser’s wild vitriol, a bad felon, nonfan, a defiant hood

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: JAIR MESSIAS BOLSONARO

Bryan Kohberger, suspect in the University of Idaho homicides

(Idaho Statesman)

Bryan Kohberger, suspect in the University of Idaho homicides
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Chief said every crime bit (her DNA) points to bookish guy. He runs.

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Image: Allen

The language that doesn't use 'no'

(BBC)

Uh-oh, a latent 'guess not' negated ~ the language that doesn't use 'no'?

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Image: Quinn Dombrowski

Editor's note: Actually, the language does have "no". See section titled "Negation" (p. 71) in this paper.

Elon Musk becomes first person ever to lose $200 billion

(New York Post)

Elon Musk becomes first person ever to lose $200 billion
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Remember: loose-lip folks not too clever in business!

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Image: DonkeyHotey

Barbara Walters, pioneering US TV news anchor, dies at 93

(The Guardian)

Barbara Walters, pioneering US TV news anchor, dies at 93
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A superlative broadcaster, a winner, now a brightness

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Susan Sermoneta

Misogynist Influencer Andrew Tate’s Rough Week Capped by Romanian Rape Arrest

(The Daily Beast)

Misogynist Influencer Andrew Tate's Rough Week Capped by Romanian Rape Arrest
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Weird, insane, creepy man lured away to a prison after Greta Thunberg mocks penis

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Image: Wikimedia

Vivienne Westwood Dies: Fashion Designer Dubbed “Godmother Of Punk” Was 81

(Deadline New York)

Dame Vivienne Westwood, a fashion designer and godmother of punk icon, has died
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“I’m good - vivid orange hair, woad, fishnets, naked pudenda - who often incensed some”

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Garry Knight

Romanian pizza box in response video to Greta Thunberg may have given away Andrew Tate’s location

(The Independent)

Romanian pizza box in response video to Greta Thunberg may have given away Andrew Tate's location
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Maybe not true. Cops are experts in analyzing data. However, wasn't it amazing, no-good, naive behavior?

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Image: Wikimedia

Pelé dies aged 82: tributes paid to a football great

(The Guardian)

“Pelé kicked magnificently with both feet, headed with his eyes open, scored goals like no one else, made passes that surprised even his teammates, killed the ball on his chest as if he were cradling it like a baby in his arms”
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Sentimentalists say he’s been ranked the king of football, i.e. he is the most acclaimed magnificent player, is best ball kicker in the world, he won three World Cups. Aye the messiah has died I sigh, keep his deeds alive please

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Foreign, Commonwealth & Development Office, UK

The Final Campaign Inside Donald Trump’s sad, lonely, thirsty, broken, basically pretend run for reelection. (Which isn’t to say he can’t win.)

(New York Magazine)

Do you remember how Sunset Boulevard ends? Norma Desmond shoots and kills the writer, a fraudster who has fallen under the spell of her charisma, just as he summons the courage to walk away. Her sycophantic butler flips. There are no enablers left to protect her. A final fantasy, a fake movie set, is staged in the mansion’s entryway. The lights go on, and she is lured before the cameras, where the police are waiting to haul her away
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Trump dynasty endgame: Shallow stylemeister Ivanka & husband separate themselves from her sentenced treasonous father Donald. He is a wealth poseur & real estate crook. He plays last golf round at Mar-a-Lago. He seethes before police haul his manacled ass away. Robot muse Melania, she returns to NY without Barron to iron her wrinkles. Thwarted featherweight hominids Don Jr. & Eric who chug beer. Ineffectual Tiffany - who’s she?

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Fabrice Florin

Unclaimed luggage piles up at airports following Southwest cancellations

(National Public Radio)

Unclaimed luggage piles up at airports following Southwest cancellations
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Awful climate clouts US; airline grapples with no plans; locations get gouged

Anagram: Russ Atkinson
Image: Chor Ip

Suspect in Paul Pelosi attack pleads not guilty to state charges

(ABC News)

Suspect in Paul Pelosi attack pleads not guilty to state charges
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DePape, at Nancy's gate to cut political target, hits spouse's skull

Anagram: Josiah Winslow
Image: Ben Schumin