Moscow Prepares for March Commemorating Russian Opposition

(VOA News)

Photo: Lithuanian Ministry of Foreign Affairs

Moscow Prepares for March Commemorating Russian Opposition Leader = Weep! Crime of horror! Appears moron Commie, Mr Putin, got a cold assassin?

(by Maurice Goddard)

Kardashians' reported $100 million deal a crime against humanity

(Melfort Journal)

Photo: BiggerPictureImages.com

"You'll be seeing a lot more of the Kardashian family." = E!: They guarantee millions for fake maids' ballyhoo

(by Jason Lofts)

Russian Patriots Want to Rename Their Town 'Putin'

(The Moscow Times)

Map: Wikimedia

Russian Patriots Want to Rename Their Town 'Putin' = O! A super epithet to a Russian rat 'n' worm 'n' nit 'n' twit!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Samantha chooses all my clothes when we go shopping, admits David Cameron

(The Daily Express)

Photo: Number 10

Samantha chooses all my clothes when we go shopping, admits David Cameron = All pants which she's chosen have a tag ''I'm Tory PM ~ Odd Case ~ I'm Mad" logo sewn on!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Oscars 2015: Eddie Redmayne wins best actor

(BBC)

Photo: Disney | ABC Television

The British actor Eddie Redmayne = They added me in their Oscar-tribe

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Kim Jong-Un: North Korea Must Be Combat Ready

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: Zennie Abraham

Kim Jong-Un: North Korea Must Be Combat Ready = Huge bum ranted on! Moronic batty jerk's amok!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Royal flush: Prince Charles visits London sewage tunnel

(Yahoo! News)


Royal flush: Prince Charles visits London sewage tunnel = Well I never! So uncanny? Sounds right place for the ill ass!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Columba Bush's lavish spending habits scrutinized

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: Wikimedia

Bush's wife Columba = Focus/whim: baubles

(by Julian Lofts)

Oscars 2015: Eddie Redmayne wins best actor

(BBC)

Photo: Disney | ABC Television

Eddie Redmayne wins an Oscar for Best Actor = See Academy's conferred its award on Briton

(by Jason Lofts)

US Marines on the Ground in Iraq as ISIS Burns 45 Alive

(Yahoo!)

Photo: remolacha

The ISIS burning massacre = Hate nurses racism, big sin

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Matt 'Megatoad' Stonie Sets Bacon Eating World Record

(Huffington Post)

Photo: Mark

Matt 'Megatoad' Stonie sets bacon eating world record = We too admit contestant gorged on America's best lard

(by Jason Lofts)

1000-Year-Old Chinese Mummy Gets CT Scan in Amersfoort

(NL Times)

Photo: Jan van Esch / Meander Medisch Centrum

Thousand-year-old Chinese mummy gets CT scan in Amersfoort = Done, team confirms hunch: Mystery gold statue's core is a man!

(by Dharam)

Man beats wife on wedding night after failing to get her dress off

(New York Post)

Photo: Facebook

Gavin Golightly beat Amy Dawson = A blond gal got way heavy smiting

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Jeb Bush: "I am my own man"

(MSNBC)

Caricature: DonkeyHotey

Jeb Bush, you're so dim to say 'I am my own man' = A hominid's mumbo jumbo. Anyway, see story...

(by Julian Lofts)

"It's Belgium, it's France, it's now Denmark"- Danish Justice Minister

(Yahoo! News)


"It's Belgium, it's France, it's now Denmark"- Danish Justice Minister = In fact, I murmur: Jihadists slew innocent residents. Big mistake!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Cindy Crawford lingerie image stirs debate over what 'real women' look like

(CNN)

Photo: Marie Claire

The US supermodel Cindy Crawford = Mad, wild cry of press: "Unretouched!"

(by Jason Lofts)

Artist Claims Hanging Penis Sculptures Are Clouds

(Huffington Post)


Artist claims hanging penis sculptures are clouds = Press criticises strange and giant "cumulo-phallus"

Artist claims hanging penis sculptures are clouds = Strange passing phallic cumulus censored. Is it art?

(by Jason Lofts)

Murder charge for Indian tycoon accused of ramming guard

(BBC)

Photo: Facebook

Murder charge for the Indian tycoon accused of ramming his guard = Horrific! One of Anu Garg's disgraced countrymen. Ah, Hummer addict!

(by Julian Lofts)

Oscar Pistorius to receive new privileges in prison

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: Lwp Kommunikáció

The South African Oscar Pistorius is to receive new privileges in prison = Soap on a rope? Vaseline? Circus rights? HIV? Enteric fissure? Peritonitis? Ow!

(by Julian Lofts)

Benedict Cumberbatch Is A Temperamental Genius In Imitation Game Trailers

(CinemaBlend)


"Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them." -William Shakespeare = Overtemperamental maths genius Alan M. Turing assesses, perseveres, breaks the Enigma code. Ooh, what a hero!

(by Jason Lofts)

A Valentine's Day wedding for Benedict Cumberbatch

(CNN)

Photo: See Li

Benedict Cumberbatch weds Sophie Hunter in small ceremony on the Isle of Wight = It means symbolic steps: no longer the unencumbered bachelor; hitched with wife.

(by Rosie Perera)

Eight Million Tons of Plastic Dumped in Ocean Every Year

(National Geographic)

Photo: Onny Carr

We dump eight million metric tons of plastic debris into the ocean each year = I see humanity's one terrific ecological problem with depths contaminated

(by Jason Lofts)

It's a 'blood-soaked conspiracy'

(The New Zealand Herald)

Photo: Ken Lee

The 'blood-soaked conspiracy' of Valentine's Day ~ and evident as proof anybody likes chocolates

(by Julian Lofts)

Pope to new cardinals: Put aside pride, jealousy, anger

(USA Today)

Photo: President Sri Lanka

Pope Francis delivers tough-love message to new cardinals: Put aside pride, jealousy and self-interests and instead exercise perfect charity = Crestfallen Papa: "You (expletive deleted) depraved , cross-dressing, effete pederasts, i.e. women/girls... You antichristian, anachronistic Judases...!"

(by Jason Lofts)

Plan to broadcast messages to alien worlds leaves cosmologists worrying

(The Independent)

Photo: Gary

The acronym SETI means Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence = Hmm. Errs in secretly alerting alien rat-races to existence of Earth.

(by Julian Lofts)

More Fighting In Ukraine After Peace Deal

(Sky News)

Photo: Joe Flood

More Fighting In Ukraine After Peace Deal = Reeking fat maniac, ogre Putin, failed here.

(by Maurice Goddard)

Palestinians call for boycott of Israeli goods

(Yahoo! News)

Photo: Gueorgui Tcherednitchenko

Palestinians call for boycott of Israeli goods = Locals' obligation is "Don't pay for foe's articles!"

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Costa Concordia captain convicted in deadly shipwreck

(CNN)

Photo: Hot Gossip Italia

Costa Concordia captain convicted in deadly shipwreck = Cap decisive action on cad and cowardly prick, Schettino.

(by Maurice Goddard)

Greece: Greenspan predicts exit from euro inevitable

(BBC)

Photo: Norse Graphics

Greenspan predicts exit from euro inevitable = Prominent US expert said final bit over Greece

(by Jason Lofts)

Military Spouses Hacked, Threatened by Alleged ISIS Sympathizer

(NBC News)

Photo: DVIDSHUB

Military spouses = ISIS tramples you

(by Rosie Perera)

Disgraced finance chief Strauss Kahn tells 'pimping' trial he 'only' managed to attend 12 orgies in three years

(Daily Mail)

Cartoon: NaOH

Dominique Strauss-Kahn on charges of proxenetism = Man sent hookers for sex orgies. Acquit? Punish? Damn?

(by Jason Lofts)

Angela Merkel faces moment of truth as war and default threaten Europe's unity

(Sydney Morning Herald)

Photo: DonkeyHotey

Angela Merkel faces moment of truth as war and default threaten Europe's unity = Deutschland woman PM hugely fears latent Eastern matter (Ukraine), fate of Euro

(by Jason Lofts)

China's secret plan to topple the US as the world's superpower

(New York Post)

Map: Tracy Lee Carroll

China's secret plan to topple the US as the world's superpower = Oh hell, PRC's apparent purpose's to screw whole United States!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Dominique Strauss-Kahn 'had no idea he was sleeping with prostitutes'

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: bixintx

Dominique Strauss-Kahn said he 'had no idea he was sleeping with prostitutes' = What's sin? I'm dispassionate. I had naps, thought nude ladies were quite kosher.

(by Julian Lofts)

Isil's manifesto for women: Marriage at nine, a sedentary life and two years' maternity leave

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: David Holt

Isil's manifesto for women = Feminists remain fools. Ow!

(by Julian Lofts)

Pope says it's OK to spank children if you don't demean them

(CNN)

Photo: Catholic Church England

Pope says it's OK to spank children if you don't demean them = Reckon his mum often spanked the soppy nit? Dad easily too!

(by Maurice Goddard)

McDonald's switches CEO amid image and menu struggles

(International Business Times)

Photo: Sarah

McDonald's switches CEO amid image and menu struggles = Menu's goddam crammed-in shit will cause congested gas!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Islamic State burns Jordanian pilot alive

(The Times of Israel)

Photo: time everydays

Lieutenant Moaz Kasasbeh = Human's ablaze. IS: "Take note!"

(by Jason Lofts)

Alexander Litvinenko 'thought Putin wasn't up to the job in secret service'

(The Independent)

Photo: Gwydion M Williams

Alexander Litvinenko 'thought Putin wasn't up to the job in secret service' = Thus one hates the villain Putin, once a KGB's joint undercover expert twit!

(by Maurice Goddard)

"American Sniper" Hits Box Office Record

(CBS DFW)

Photo: remolacha.net

Clint Eastwood's "American Sniper" Hits Box Office Record = Combat and sinister exploits offer a crowd nice heroics!

(by Maurice Goddard)

No correlation between anti-vaccine views and political party, study finds

(Circa)

Photo: Gates Foundation

No correlation between anti-vaccine views and political party, study finds = Story ran widely: idiotic Republicans and even top wits on Left can act naive.

(by Rosie Perera)

Michael Jackson's Neverland ranch to become rehab facility

(Yahoo!)

Photo: Jonathan Haeber

Michael Jackson's Neverland ranch to become a rehab facility = Ahem! An inconceivably tactless, macabre joke for children. Ha!

(by Julian Lofts)

'Heinous': Outrage After Claim That ISIS Killed Japanese Hostage

(NBC News)


'Heinous': Outrage after claim that ISIS killed Japanese hostage = The foe decapitate Asian journalist. "Hell, a gruesome task!" I sigh.

(by Jason Lofts)