Fed Judge Says 'Criminal' Trump Only Pardons Republicans, Child Murderer Or Turkey

(Newsweek)

"It's not surprising that a criminal like Trump pardons other criminals," senior United States District Federal Judge Robert Pratt of the Southern District of Iowa said on Tuesday. "But apparently to get a pardon, one has to be either a Republican, a convicted child murderer or a turkey."
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That apish tyrant relished absolution of turpitude: Roger Stone, Paul Manafort, Charles Kushner, Blackwater security contractors in penitentiaries. The horrid megalomaniac, purporting to be POTUS, subverted and jeopardised democracy. It isn’t adult, I find it is retarded, I retort!

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Alex McCrae

French fashion designer Pierre Cardin dies, aged 98

(The New Zealand Herald)

The fashion designer Pierre Cardin
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Pioneering thread franchiser dies

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Budiey

Eminent Chomsky Says Trump a 'Sociopathic Megalomaniac'

(Common Dreams)

Four years with an unhinged 'Sociopathic Megalomaniac' in power
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Legacy of paranoiac, Trump, incriminated in heinous hogwash woe.

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: Powell Burns

Hilaria Baldwin admits fake Spanish accent, real name

(Eminetra)

What's the most risible Hispanic edition of Blackface?
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So meet Hilaria Baldwin, accept it is kibosh, then scoff

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Joella Marano

Grim milestone: 1 in 1,000 Americans dead from COVID-19; US surpasses 19 million case

(ABC12)

A grim Coronavirus data milestone for the United States has been reached
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One in a thousand dead is most abhorrent, it’s accelerative - fear the germ, US!

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Travis Wise

Nashville Christmas Bomber

(USA Today)

Nashville Christmas Bomber
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Loner, he blabs, harms victims

Anagram: Russ Atkinson
Image: Ninian Reid

Emergency crews sing 'Happy Birthday' to Dr. Fauci

(NBC News)

Our best wishes to the octogenarian Doctor Anthony Fauci
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But who? Fantastic US hero, a geriatric doyen - oho, no contest!

Anagram: Julian Lofts

Don't Tell Your Kids About Santa

(Friendly Atheist)

Don't Tell Your Kids About Santa
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Look, it's undoubtedly Satan. Rat!
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Look out, standard but nasty lie!

Anagrams: Russ Atkinson, Aronas Pinchas
Image: Gary Watts

It Was All A Lie by Stuart Stevens

Santa Claus rescued from power lines while making parachute candy deliver

(WFLA)

Santa Claus rescued from power lines while making parachute candy delivery
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Rudolph's new name? Sparky! "I feel ashamed..." Wiry voltages incur a cruel accident.

Anagram: Steve Allison

Trump goes on a rampage with pardons, veto threats and Covid denial

(CNN)

Snide Trump approves ~ presumptive pardons

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Duncan C

Hawaii residents told to stay home as Kilauea volcano erupts

(CNN)

Hawaii residents told to stay home as Kilauea volcano erupts
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Sky, rain, sea. Hot lava, ash, pumice and sterile soot, too. A wilt due.

Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Ninian Reid

As end approaches, Trump gets doses of flattery, finality

(ABC News)

As end approaches, Trump gets doses of flattery, finality
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Fact: GOP's fatty "Dear Leader" suns himself on potty praise!

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: FolsomNatural

The first Canadian astronaut

(Reuters)

The first Canadian astronaut ~ can start shared infatuation

Anagram: Russ Atkinson
Image: NASA Johnson

Suboptimal US Response to COVID-19 Despite Robust Capabilities and Resources

(JAMA)

Some Nations Battling COVID Infection 1. The United States of America 2. Sweden 3. Italy 4. China 5. Australia 6. United Kingdom

=

1. Fucked 2. Tried herd immunity - a debacle 3. Devastation 4. Stonewalling causation 5. Hesitation 6. Nation’s stigma Confine it!

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Marco Verch

Japan's Pajama Suit helps teleworkers look good for Zoom calls

(Reuters)

Japan's Pajama Suit helps teleworkers look good for Zoom calls
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A promo shows snooze apparel just like all good formal jackets.

Anagram: Dharam
Image: Asamblea Nacional

The Electoral College is voting to cement Joe Biden's victory over Trump

(CNBC)

The Electoral College is voting to cement Joe Biden's victory over Trump
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Elect moving choice over a vilest, jeering, rotten-to-petty, cold loser bum.

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: Jeff Gates

The US election and the age of dreampolitik

(The New York Times)

The US elections and the age of Dreampolitik
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Hotheaded ace felon Trump seeks litigation

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Jeff Gates

A filter made for astronaut urine could soon be providing drinking water on Earth

(CNN)

A filter made for astronaut urine could soon be providing drinking water on Earth
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Uh, I don't want to drink astronaut urine! No go. Cold lemonade? Brrr... is pee-giver affair!

Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Steve P2008

GOP Senator Says 'Country First' as Electoral College to Meet

(Bloomberg)

GOP Senator Says 'Country First' as Electoral College to Meet
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So yell it close to Trump's nasty ego-rotten glare-coarse face!

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: Amaury Laporte

Treasure Washes Up on Venezuela’s Shore

(The New York Times)

Treasure Washes Up on Venezuela’s Shore
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unshaven use sheer zeal, swoop treasure

Anagram: Russ Atkinson
Image: Stig Nygaard

Donald Trump to be 'one of the worst' presidents in history, say 42 percent of Americans

(Newshub)

Donald Trump to be 'one of the worst' presidents in history
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Stupidest twit, nonprofessional tyro, dethroned hombre

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Amaury Laporte

Jerrold M. Post, Specialist in Political Psychology, Dies

(The New York Times)

Jerrold M. Post, Specialist in Political Psychology and an author, dies
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So, analysed loopy politicos - Trump (griper), Clinton (lech), Sadat, jihadis

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: usstratcom

Biden and Harris named Time's Person of the Year

(BBC)

Time unveils the Persons of the Year: Biden and Harris
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Doyen, heroine. Banish fiend Trump, arrest the vile ass!

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Time

Ivanka Trump ‘Not Wanted’ posters appear across New York City

(The Independent)

Two ardent pests on ~ Not Wanted posters = Two star deponents

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Twitter

Melania Trump just wants to go home

(CNN)

Melania Trump just wants to go home
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A ma uptown mourns - get a jet! Him? Lost!

Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Anthony Quintano

On record day for covid-19 deaths, Trump falsely proclaims at packed Hanukkah party, "We're going to win this election."

(Washington Post)

On record day for covid-nineteen deaths, Trump falsely proclaims at packed Hanukkah party, 'We're going to win this election'.
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Deep in a world of inane fantasy, a chronically petty, power-demented, ogreish Lame Duck viperous crook, can't think straight!

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: Zach Korb

Letters to Santa reveal the toll the pandemic is taking on kids

(CNN)

Letters to Santa reveal the toll the pandemic is taking on kids
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Dear Santa,
I'm little songster Chloe. I'd love a pet kitten!
Thanks!

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: Alvin Trusty

Elon Musk Moves to Texas, Takes Jab at Silicon Valley

(The Wall Street Journal)

Elon Musk Moves to Texas, Takes Jab at Silicon Valley
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All talk. A lot! A vast jobs event - Musk's eye is on Mexico...
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Love less taxes! Jovial Alamo mutiny. Token setbacks.

Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Thomas Hawk

Fact-checking the craziest news conference of the Trump Presidency

(Washington Post)
Embed from Getty Images

Melissa Carone
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Lies On Cameras

Anagram: PKB

Melania’s tennis pavilion and other White House makeovers

(BBC)

Melania's tennis pavilion and other White House makeovers
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Hah! Vain, inane amusements while peons toil, starve or die, OK!

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: Mike Licht

Biden picks retired general Lloyd Austin

(Politico)

Biden picks retired general Lloyd Austin
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Superior black general did end it in style

Anagram: Russ Atkinson
Image: Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff

Federal judge dismisses Sidney Powell lawsuit that sought to overturn Trump loss in Georgia

(CNBC)

Federal judge dismisses Sidney Powell lawsuit that sought to overturn Trump loss in Georgia
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Just to protest, this gruesome woman and gross old Rudy Giuliani, spew the ugliest false drivel!

Anagram: Maurice Goddard
Image: Mike Finn

Asteroid Ryugu Sample Collected in Space and Delivered to Earth

(SciTechDaily)

Asteroid Ryugu Sample Collected in Space and Delivered to Earth
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Early, odd galactic Christmas present, dude - top valued, eerie Noel!

Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Kevin Gill

Mary Trump on President Trump’s Election Conspiracy Theories

Trump’s election theories
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O, the supreme inciter lost

Anagram: Julian Lofts

Denmark to dig up thousands of dead mink after carcasses emerge from mass graves

(CNN)

Denmark to dig up thousands of dead mink after carcasses emerge from mass graves
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Easter!? Grave moods, a dark past. Mummified stench reeks. Damn ground gas scares off.

Anagram: Steve Allison
Image: Becca Tyler

Melania Trump reveals Christmas display at White House

(The New Zealand Herald)

"America the Beautiful" Christmas display in the White House
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Trump’s chic wife Melania hates Yuletide brouhaha - “It’s shite!”

Anagram: Julian Lofts
Image: FLOTUS